Food: One of the Most Unifying Tools in the Hands of Homemaker

Every family has their own food culture. Favorite recipes and traditions passed down through generations, foods from an ethnic heritage, as well as lifestyle foods based on health, convenience, and economics all make up the circumference of foods a family regularly enjoys. Certain foods in each family are also traditional for certain holidays, and occasions.

My Food Heritage: My mother fed my family a diet of real food, very little sugar, a lot of vegetables, whole grains, venison my Daddy hunted and everything made from scratch. We ate out only a few times a year. My family also ate foods from my Dad’s Norwegian heritage. Lefse was a common evening treat. And for many years I requested fish soup for my birthday dinner. We also ate a lot of Mexican food. My Dad was raised in the Southwest, and my Mother met him while she was getting her degree in Spanish there. My mother has a lot of German in her heritage, so we also enjoyed plenty of meat and potato meals. My family gardened unfaithfully. I remember a couple of years of a good garden, but it wasn’t a huge part of my life. We bought most of our produce. My Dad is a hunter however, and we ate a lot of venison and wild turkey from what he killed. We also raised chickens for many years and we ate their eggs and sometimes we ate them.
My mother didn’t buy jello, cool whip, cake, frozen foods, processed foods, white bread, margarine, or pudding mixes. We never kept soda in the house. I only got pop on a very rare occasion…courtesy of my Daddy. I grew up enjoying a large variety of food. And to this day, I am always up for trying food. I especially like trying foods from other cultures. Korean food is one of my personal favorites.

My Husband’s Food Heritage: My husband has other cultivated tastes. His family had a garden throughout most of his childhood, and his mother canned, and canned, and canned. His family was also very restricted in their food budget due to income. So, he did not eat a huge variety of foods nor did he eat out much as a child. His mother is a phenomenal cook. Many of her recipes are my husband’s favorites to this day. She did use canned soups and a lot of prepared foods in her cooking, so my husband is accustomed to those flavors. My husband is still very content eating chocolate pudding from a mix, cool whip, or frozen french fries. My husband, being raised in southern states also LOVES sweet tea. It is a huge part of his life. He isn’t opposed to drinking a can of Pepsi on occasion either. My husband is not necessarily health conscious, he would tell you that is my job. Jim is particular about the taste and texture of his food, so the quality of cooking and the methods food is cooked are important to him. He would probably say that classic American fair is his favorite food genre…hamburgers, hot-dogs, meatloaf, fried chicken, and a hearty steak; all served with fries…. Although Italian foods would not be far behind.

Our family’s Food Culture: As a newlywed, I did my best to learn how to cook the foods my husband grew up eating. I had fun experimenting on him with some new recipes too, but I admit I also had a good share of failures, even though I was a home-economics major. My biggest challenge was in choosing what foods to cook. My husband and I both have a different food heritage. We both have different likes and dislikes. We are also both genetically different and were born with different dispositions toward food.

For a while, I simply tried to adapt to the foods my husband was raised eating. I stuck to a lot of his mother’s recipes. But, as children came along, my pursuit of healthier foods increased. I was also more restricted in my budget the larger our family grew. I could not afford the amount of beef and leaned heavily on meatless dishes and poultry. I don’t care what anyone says, as soon as one is buying anything prepared, the grocery bill goes up. Even a pack of taco seasoning or gravy mix is more expensive than mixes ones own spices. And additives and sugars in those packets are not healthy to intake. Eating healthy is far more budget friendly than unhealthy food. I gradually began adding whole wheat pasta to our white pasta, whole grain rice to our white rice, and making my own mixes and such. Eventually we had a diet whole grain. Other than making play-dough, it has been seven years since I have purchased white flour. I even learned how to make my own whole wheat bread, and quit buying store-bought foods as much as possible.

The change was not quick. But over time, our family has morphed into eating foods that are normal for us. How we eat is not like my family ate when I was growing up, and it is not like how my husband ate growing up. In fact, I cannot say it is even a combination of the two. It is simply a culture of food unique to our family. As my menu guide explains, I have a workable pattern for buying and cooking meals for our family.

I remember making my first pack of instant pudding. I used hot water instead of cold and ruined it. I continually failed in making my husband’s favorite chicken and rice casserole. The rice was always crunchy. Apparently instant rice was the key. I didn’t know there was such a thing. I never ate a box of mac ‘n cheese until I was married and cooking in my own. I got nervous cooking up my first batch from the box. I think it turned out okay.

What determines how we eat?

My budget dictates the majority of the food we eat. I try to have at least one meal a week without meat to save money. Other than a steak my husband will pick up on occasion, I rarely buy beef. We eat chicken a couple of times a week, ground turkey in place of ground beef, occasionally pork roast if I can get it for .99 a pound, and if we are lucky some venison from my Dad. Meatless dishes often play a role for dinner. Tonight, we had loaded baked potatoes for dinner. Another night we might have, home-made Mac ‘n cheese, or even breakfast for dinner, like waffles or eggs.

Nutrition is also something I consider valuable when planning meals. I rely heavily on whole, real foods. I try to get foods that do not have labels. So most of our food is in its truest form. I buy organic when it is reasonable, but I don’t sweat it if I can’t afford that. Honestly, I am not entirely convinced it isn’t a marketing scam. Quality is of most importance, and organic produce is often the best looking with the truest flavors. A farmer’s stand or market is ideal, but not currently most practical for our family. I buy whole grain flours, rice, and pasta. I am also careful not to incorporate much sugar into our diet. We don’t eat dessert, and I substitute coconut sugar or raw honey in most of my baking. My goal in food for our family is simply to make it as real and nutrient dense as I am able to afford. The book: Real Food: What to Eat and Why by Nina Plank is probably the most influential book on healthy eating that I have read. Nina also has a blog with some great recipes that we enjoy http://ninaplanck.com/.

Affection and comfort also are important in the food choices of our home. I save my experimentation for lunchtime with me and the children. My husband does not need the stress of trying new foods at the end of a crazy day. So, I will have seaweed and sticky rice with kimchi for lunch with the children, but never for dinner. I often will make something that is a favorite of my husband to cheer him during a stressful time or to simply show I love him. I also do the same for my children. I like to use food as a tool to bring comfort and show love during certain times.

Sharing the food our family eats with others is also an important way to minister. Since we often have people eat with us, it is a great opportunity to share the culture of our family through the venue of food. It allows a person to become a part of our family in a way, while they eat dinner with us. If I were going to Africa and sat with a family for dinner there, I would be taking part of their culture and family through the meal they served me. It is the same in the states from family to family. We each can allow someone to enter into our zone, but sharing a meal our family would normally eat with them.

Food is for celebration. I was recently reminded of the children of Israel and how God set aside special days for them to celebrate and feast. There are days that we set aside for celebration. Generally I do not insist on healthy eating during those days of celebration. There are special seasons for feasting and being grateful. And I do not tag those times with health concerns.

Food should unify not separate. Overall, my point in creating a certain food culture for my family is that it brings people together in unity.  I use food as a tool to build my family and bring others into the dynamics of our home. Food is a method to help my family be healthy and strong, but it is not my reliance as my article on nutrition points out. And I don’t argue with my husband about food. Yes, I tend to be more health conscious than my husband, but our relationship is more important than if he eats his vegetables or not. And I make a batch of sweet tea with real sugar for him every weekend. I bring people together in our home around food. I bless my family and guests with wholesome meals for my family and guests. I use food to create warm feelings and memories. Who doesn’t cherish the morning waking up to the smell of freshly baked cinnamon rolls smothered in cream cheese frosting? We gather together nearly every evening for dinner in our home. It is the point in the day we can be together. I serve dinner on time and I am usually well planned in my menu and ingredients that making dinner is stress free. Food is such a great method to bring people together. Even taking a batch of freshly baked cookies to a new neighbor can help breech any divides and begin to build a relationship. Food opens doors of building relationships with people. I truly believe that food is a very important tool in the hand of a homemaker. A wise homemaker will study how to use food for the advantage of the gospel and the blessing of her family.

Graham Flour Banana Bread

The nutty, warm flavor of graham flour has made this one of my favorite banana bread recipes. I make this recipe into muffins as well. And for those with egg allergies…this recipe doesn’t have them.

1/3 Cup Oil (I use grape seed or coconut)

½ Cup Applesauce

2/3 Cup Honey (Coconut Sugar may be substituted for honey. It will lower the glycemic index)

3 Small Mashed Bananas (2 cups)

1 ½ Cup Graham Flour (Whole Wheat Flour may serve as a substitute, but it will not taste quite as good as graham flour, and it will have a higher glycemic index than the graham.)

1 ¼ teaspoons Baking Powder

½ teaspoon Baking Soda

¾ teaspoon Salt

1) Mix ingredients together
2) Pour into muffin tins or lined loaf pan
3) Bake bread for 1 hour or muffins for 25 minutes at 350.

Mashed sweet potatoes can be substituted for the bananas, add a dash of cinnamon for a great autumn flavor.

I often make muffins or quick bread for breakfast. It is an easy way for me to use fruit and vegetables and simple to keep on hand for the children to have for a snack later in the day as well.

I keep a variety of flours on hand in my freezer. I enjoy using various grains instead of just wheat. Graham flour is a wheat based, whole grain flour it is ground differently than whole wheat flour producing  a higher fiber and courser grain than traditional whole wheat flour. Graham flour gives bread, crusts, and even some cookies an amazing rich flavor. It is like adding graham cracker crust to baked items…simply delicious.

My Husband’s Safe Place

A few weeks after Jim and I began dating, we were still feeling very vulnerable and cautious in our relationship. It was at that point  that a quarter entered the picture. Jim described his heart like a quarter a little boy has. Sometimes the little boy pulls the quarter out of his pocket to show it, but then puts it back in his pocket for safe keeping. I remember Jim telling me  “Rebecca, someday I would like you to have my quarter to keep forever.” We both understood that “quarter” meant his heart.

It was a few weeks later (our relationship moved fast) when Jim pulled out a slim, flat, blue box with the words “U.S. Mint” on the top. He handed it to me. I opened it to find two shiny new quarters. Based on our earlier conversation, I knew Jim had given me his whole heart. Jim told me that he actually had no trouble giving me his heart, and it came easily and naturally. I remember fighting back tears as I handed him one of the quarters to show him, that I too was entrusting my heart to his care. The other quarter I have kept until this day.

We are now eleven years and four children deep in our marriage. And I still keep my husband’s quarter safe. I do not take the keeping of his heart lightly. Our challenges on a daily basis supersede the simple crisis that popped up during our courtship days. My husband kindly bears the brunt of the burden of the care of me and the children.

It is a tough world for the only money-maker in our home. There are people my husband works with who are demeaning, irresponsible, egotistical, lazy, cranky, and negligent. Such people he is around every day for 9-10 hours. Besides the difficult people my husband engages with on a daily basis, he, like most working folk, has a job that is stressful. There are problems and crisis that pop up even simultaneously. My husband’s days are full of deadlines, schedules, classes, and meetings. Even at home, he is bombarded with phone calls in the evenings and weekends, and required to settle company concerns at a moment’s notice. Such is that nature of what my husband does. I do believe, it is a common type of life most employed people have.

My day is also full. I am greeted with a whining baby first thing in the morning. He tends to be cranky until after his morning nap. My children are not always pleasant. They argue, complain, and can be disobedient. Even when the children are cheerfully obeying, we are busy. My days are full of tending to children, housekeeping, cooking, planning, schooling, laundry, and the business of the home. I can get tired and ornery. Just like those who go to work, my days are stressful, even though my stresses and concerns are different from those with jobs outside the home, the topics of concern are just as meaningful to me as though I was paid for my work. It is easy for me to become self-focused on my needs and the troubles of the home that I neglect to have compassion on my hard-working husband.

But I have found it easy to set my selfish feelings of the day aside when I think with compassion toward my husband. Love is self-sacrificing. My husband sacrifices every day of his life by working hard and giving his hard earnings to feed, shelter, and care for the needs of me and the children. His sacrificial love for our family is something I truly cherish. I get to enjoy the days at home with my children because my husband works hard. Even those rough days I have at home, are probably better than one of his easy days at the office. I wouldn’t trade the moments I am able to share with my little ones for anything in the world. I am truly grateful for my husband’s job and his willingness to give me his earnings to spend on electricity and groceries.

Besides working hard to provide for our family, my husband takes our emotional and spiritual needs seriously. He is responsible for our hearts, and he knows it. There are days I save certain issues for him to deal with after he gets home from work. For a time, he gave our eldest daughter her reading lessons because she wasn’t putting forth her best effort for me. She seemed to do better for Daddy. He also helped potty train our littlest girl, who simply became too lazy to take the time to go potty when she needed. Somehow, Daddy was able to get through to her when mommy had no effect. My middle child wears glasses, she doesn’t like them, but it is necessary. Often our baby boy needs a bath in the evening. My husband is quick to volunteer with that task while I clean up from dinner. It helps for my husband to get involved in asking her about them when he gets home from work. So, when he gets home, there is no putting up of his feet watching TV. He is busy, just like me, until every child is in bed for the night. And then, there is me. I am a woman…emotional…hormonal…and well complicated. My husband loves me dearly and does his best to help me sort out my heart and re-focus ton the Lord.

My husband also has jobs around the house that he does. He mows the grass, fixes broken things, moves heavy things, repairs and remodels as needed. He has come home many an evening to do manual labor on the house until dark.

So, after taking the time to reflect on all my husband does and the burden he bears in life, I can easily find gratitude and compassion for him. He is tired and emotionally spent from a days work. He needs a place he can be at ease I feel very strongly that I am to be my husband’s safe place.

I am cautious about addressing my concerns. Not that I do not share my opinions and timidly hold up the wall. But that I am gentle with my words and careful about timing when I do discuss heavy topics with my husband. The moment he walks in the door from work is never the time to bombard him with my concerns, difficulty I have had with the children, or a crisis that came up. That can all wait until he has taken a few long breaths…usually after dinner. I am not saying this is how it is ALWAYS played out in our home, but I do put forth a conscious effort to give him some peace after he gets home, and time my conversations for when he is relaxed. Sometimes, I have waited a few days until he is through a stressful situation at work.

I am not my husband’s critic. When Jim is with me, he should feel free and open. He can be vulnerable with assurance of my support. He shouldn’t be on edge, wondering if he is going to do something to upset me. He shouldn’t have to worry about everything he says in case it might hurt my feelings. He shouldn’t feel my critical eye with how he disciplines the children, eats, organizes his day, or addresses a situation. My husband needs to feel at ease and at home with me. There are times I fail in this matter, but with every passing year, I am learning to allow my husband to make his own paths with my support. Perhaps I will eventually be consistant in relinquishing control of his choices and methods.

I make myself available for companionship. Jim and I curl up on the couch together nearly every evening after the children are in bed. I don’t pull out my knitting, a book, my phone, or the laptop. We might watch a show we both enjoy or a NASCAR race. It makes no difference. I am there, strictly for snuggling. I don’t mind curling up on him and doing nothing for a couple of hours at the end of the day. Being a warm companion is crucial to being my husband’s safe place. My world and his are joined. Although we both have tasks throughout the day that we must do, our hearts are all knotted up together and we look forward to being together the end of each day. I want my husband to long for that time snuggling with me. It is when he is with me that he does not get criticisms, conflict, or reproach.

I want him to be at peace with me. We have had brief seasons of tension, and neither of us like that, and work at making those moments of tension as brief as possible. I am not a perfect, supportive, devoted wife, but I value my position as my husband’s safe place and I guard that role. I struggle with submission, but the point is that I struggle. I do my best to give my husband preferrance. Sometimes that comes easily, and other times it is difficult. But i know, he loves me, and also seeks what is best for me, even if I disagree as to what that might be.

I speak highly of him. I never degrade him in public or private conversation. My husband knows, at least I believe he knows, that I do not ever paint him in a bad light even when chatting with my closest family members and friends. In fact, very much the opposite. He is a fabulous man. So, I honestly have nothing bad to report about him. I love everything about him…even his quirks are very dear to me. The husband of the virtuous woman mentioned in Proverbs 31:23, “Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land.” I believe no man stands a chance of success if he is not promoted first by his wife. No wife does her husband favors if she complains and makes fun of him. I find much of my inspiration from women like Clementine Churchill and Elizabeth Bunyan. Women who truly sustained their husbands through difficult and complicated years. Because of women like them, we have men like Winston Churchill and John Bunyon. 

Now, one might ask if I have a bit of an old-fashioned mentality in such devotion to my husband. Perhaps that is the case, but it is my mentality about the untily of marriage that is probably the motivvation for my adoration of my husband. I believe marriage should have a mutually supportive role, adorned by a selfless love for each other. I don’t see my husband as alone, and he doesn’t see me as alone. We are one…one unit…one person. Just last night, a leaf ended up at the bottom of our sheets. I made the comment that it must have gotten stuck to “our foot.” My husband got a kick out of that, but truly, his foot and my foot are pretty much a part of the same unit in my mind. We don’t peruse our own agendas and goals. We are as one single being working together for one goal. And that goal is to bring God the most glory we are able through our lives, love, and oneness in marriage.

And if anyone were to ask where my safe place is. Most certainly it is with my husband.

The Second Life of Grandma’s Old Hankies

Old things have gradually found a place in my home. I have a great appreciation for rekindling a period of time when life moved at a slower pace than today. Grandma’s old handkerchiefs have replaced boxes of tissues many times. I keep a hankie in my purse, apron pocket, and bed stand. If my children have rubbed their little noses raw with paper tissues, grandma’s hankies never fail to soften the blow of a cold. The soft batiste cottons of times past are easy on the nose, the economy, and my budget.

Grandma has passed a few stacks of lovely old hankies on to me. Some hankies were folded neatly in a tissue box and paper, with a note about who embroidered them and who they belonged too. My Grandmother is a great family historian. I have found her old handkerchiefs to be a treasure. It is like having a little history in my pocket. I think about my grandmother, aunt, or great-grandmother who finely embroidered the hankie every time I blow my nose, or wipe a tear. Using old handkerchiefs brings me warmth and thoughtfulness for a brief moment. Not one of those hankies can be bought in a store today. I truly cherish them. In a world where paper has replaced finery, I like to bring a little charm back into my life, by incorporating practical pieces of history. For me, grandma’s old handkerchiefs are great additions to my daily life and add a personal touch in a sweet and easy way.

I do not like all things old, for me, it has to save me money, be practical, and it is nice if it belonged to someone I knew. Some other heirloom items I enjoy using in my home are old recipes, furniture, books, and dishes. I don’t keep something for the sake of keeping it. Although, there are a few exceptions to that rule. Overall,  like to be able to use a vintage item, not tuck it away in a chest. My grandmother’s old hankies are certainly one of my favorite keepsakes.

My Modern Shopping Techniques

2017-11-21-10.31.43.jpg

My mother created a grocery spreadsheet on her computer. She spent time every other week going through her list on the computer and marking down everything we needed to buy. She wrote items in short hand to save space and time. She did not coupon or shop sales. She loves getting everything in one store and getting it done efficiently. My mother is a goal oriented shopper.

Then I come along, and I am a little of both mother and grandmother. My shopping methods have changed throughout the years. I am certain most woman find that to be the case. When it was just me and my husband, we often got groceries together and there was not the concern for budget and time or even nutrition that children bring into the picture. Now that I have four children, time, budget, and nutrition have become the basis of my meal planning, grocery lists, and shopping trips. I also consider the stress factor. Taking four children in and out of a car, missing nap times, or being gone during lunch, all play a role. So I try to keep life simple, and as stress free as possible. I keep our errands down to one or two stops, and no more. I often plan to buy or bring a snack for the children to eat in the car as we journey. (Note: I plan the treats, we don’t get to the store and beg for this and that. We either already have something in the car, or I told them they could pick out a pretzel at Lidl or get a box of goldfish crackers at Aldi). I also combine shopping trips on days we are already doing something like a doctor’s appointment. That saves us the hassle of going out more than once a week. We don’t get fast-food lunches while out. That is costly. If I know we are not going to make it home by lunch, I pack them something. They love it, and so do I.

In our era of technology, shopping itself is undergoing a transition from my mother and grandmother’s generations. Online shopping and smartphones both play a huge role in my shopping lists and purchases. I find I can easily check out deals from various stores with the store apps. I also can see if an online order would be advantageous.

In our current location, I have found Aldi generally has the best quality for the best prices ON FOOD. I also like the fact that the store is small, and I can get through it quickly with my cart loaded with children. We also have Lidl and Walmart where I seek out deals. Target and CVS also come into play and I typically get PAPER GOOD, DIAPERS, and WASHING SUPPLIES from those two stores.

How I make a Grocery List

1200x630wa

I use the Walmart grocery pick-up app. Many Walmart stores offer free pick-up. By using the grocery app, I can create a list and use it to quickly compare prices at other stores.

Screenshot_20180906-081958.jpg

A day or two before we get groceries, I browse ads from local grocery stores, in particular, Aldi and Lidl. Aldi and Lidl have comparable prices, but Aldi is far superior in quality. Lidl however does come up with some surprisingly good produce and meat deals. So I watch them both. I will plan my shopping trip by going to the store that has the best deals for the weekend. On a rare occasion that may include a couple of stores, usually one to get the majority of groceries and another to run in and stock up on a Coupons? particular deal.

Using my Walmart list, I shop through Aldi. Since the Walmart app lists a price for each item, I can see my shopping total and easily compare between Walmart and any other store. For instance, I can see that a gallon of whole milk is $3.29 at Walmart, while I am at Aldi, they are selling a gallon of milk for $2.98. So, I pick up the milk at Aldi for $2.98, and delete it from my Walmart list. Sometimes an item is cheaper at Walmart than Aldi. For instance, a pound of butter is about $2.50 at Aldi, however, if I purchase the two pack at Walmart the butter is only $1.99 a pound. So I leave that on my list and will get it at Walmart. Whatever is left at the end of my trip to Aldi, I get at Walmart. I will either send my order to our Wal-Mart pick-up store and go pick it up at a later date, or run by a store and get those items that day. It depends on the day.

Coupons? I don’t clip coupons anymore. I used to be an avid coupon shopper, but coupons seem to continually decrease in value. I also kept finding that I would get the paper only to clip out one coupon. I simply don’t most items promoted on coupons. I don’t purchase many cleaning products, I don’t buy a lot of prepared food, and name brands are still more costly than generic even with a coupon added. Besides, Aldi doesn’t accept coupons, and I like the simplicity of that. I do use coupon on apps like Target and Lidl. This past week Lidl had a coupon for a pound of pure maple syrup at 50% off. Target has a cartwheel feature on their store app, they also have coupons that can be printed. CVS and Walgreens also have apps with coupons. CVS allows me to send coupons to my store card.

My shopping rules:

  1. Don’t by name brand items-generally I have found various store brands to be equal in quality and much more reasonable in price than a name brand. The white kitchen trash bags in Target’s Up and Up brand are superior in quality to the similar versions in Glad or Hefty. Most of the food we eat is created from a staple product in my kitchen. It is economical and healthy.
  2. Stick to Staples. Like my mini wardrobe, staple items in the kitchen are the building blocks for any meal. I can create a lot more variety with a box of macaroni or a package of jasmine rice than I can with a box of mac’n cheese and seasoned rice. I can do anything with a whole chicken, Asian, Mexican, Roasting, Soup, Strogenoff, Thai, African, Sweet and Sour…but a pre-seasoned or rotisserie chicken is what is it…nothing more.
  3. If something is added to the list, take something off the list. I have a budget for the month for groceries. I divide that amount up per week, and stick to it. Generally, my goal is to even purchase items below my weekly allotment, because I know there will always be an item I run out of before expected to purchase it. Like milk, tissues, diapers, or dish soap. In an effort to keep myself under the grocery bill allotment for the week, I do not buy items that are not on my list. This works great if my children ask me if they can pick up a box of cereal or something else that catches their eye. I just tell them “it is not on the list.” For some reason, that works. If it is not on the list, we don’t buy it. I do give myself room for a few exceptions though. If there is an item I choose to purchase that is not on my list, I substitute it for an item on my list. For instance, if I get to the store and find the peaches are at an amazing price and they look fabulous, I will pick up peaches, and remove the apples from my list. It doesn’t always work out that the items are of equal value, but I do my best to keep my budget balance, by allowing little room for a drastic price change.
  4. Remove any non-essentials from the list before going shopping. I often create a list of all the items we need on my Wal-Mart list. Then as I shop, I ask myself if it is something we can live without for another week, or it is something we need now? It is amazing how many items are either luxury items and can wait…especially if it is the end of the month when my grocery well is about dry. I will even pass up sales of items I do not truly need. It is cheaper not to buy at all than to buy an item on sale.
  5. Don’t habitually make-unplanned shopping trips. Those spur of the moment trips to the store, even to grab one needed item. They not only take valuable time, but always cost more than a planned trip. For instance, if I need a gallon of milk, and I run into a store, I am often going to choose a store that is an easy in and out, and will pay more for that gallon of milk than is reasonable. I inevitably will be lured into purchasing a couple other items on my way through the store. Even if those extra items are on sale, that trip still cost me more than it should have. So, planning is essential to avoid spur of the moment excursions to the store. I need to know how much milk we go through in a week so I can get it at once and not have to run out before my scheduled shopping trip to get more. Menu planning, grocery planning, and a little time spent in knowing where the best prices can be found are essential to a good grocery trip. Yesterday was Wednesday, I usually get groceries toward the end of each week, but we had simply run out of milk. I either purchased too little or we used more than expected, so I needed to get more milk. Instead of just running out to get milk, I planned my entire shopping trip early. We got everything we would need for the next week and a half.
  6. Know prices. I pay attention to prices. I know the prices of staples our family uses. When we moved from the mid-west to the east, I immediately knew my groceries would cost more here, because the milk at Aldi cost more in The South than in the Mid-West. It is hard to know a good deal on apples if I don’t even know the regular price per pound. So, I have a mental idea of prices and can spot a good deal when I see one, not just because a grocery store tells me it is a good deal either. What might be a good deal at one store, might be the regular price at another store.
  7. Easy on the meat. Meat and cheese are generally some of the most expensive grocery items. I generally purchase meat that is under a dollar a pound. To do that, I wait for sales, and usually only buy certain cuts or uncut meat like whole birds. Whole Chickens are .89 a pound at our Aldi. And who says turkey has to wait until Thanksgiving? A turkey can be priced below a dollar a pound and be a great poultry buy. Often there are sales on chicken breasts, legs, and thighs and when they dip below a dollar a pound, I stock up. I do splurge on beef and buy organic ground beef from Aldi (I have my reasons). I try to make the ground beef last a month or more and use ground turkey for most of our ground meat needs. I generally save the beef for company.
  8. I do the Prep myself. I do not buy foods that have been cut, shredded, or prepared for me. Not only do I find those items to be low quality, but more expensive as well. For instance, pre-shredded cheese might be convenient, but it lacks the creaminess of the cheese I shred myself. I find it to be dry, and it is coated with cornstarch to prevent it sticking in the bag. It doesn’t cook up or melt the same as the cheese I shred myself. I can buy a 32 ounce block of cheese for $7 and shred it my food processor when we get home. It is far cheaper and tastier than the pre-shredded cheese. The same thought goes for produce and meat. Produce looses nutrients when it is cut as well, so I am doing my family a favor by cutting it as we need it. I do not buy the little carrots pre-cut. Not only are they serious choking hazards, but far more expensive than a pound of organic carrots for .99. I can cut them into sticks myself.

And that is pretty much my philosophy and methods of getting food and essentials for our home. I imagine it will change through time. And I also don’t believe it is the best method for everyone. My grandmother would find my method of shopping very unsuitable for one person. And larger family may find buying bulk foods from Costco or Sams to be the most effective method of getting groceries. I do hold to the fact that planning is essential for any effective shopping trip and I also believe, no matter the size of the grocery budget, we are to be wise stewards. A large or non-existent grocery budget does not permit us Christians the freedom to spend carelessly. We are also held accountable for our time. I don’t believe we should over-obsess in the process of getting groceries. It can become materialism if we are obsessed with the best deals and always printing coupons. So, again, moderation is essential to biblical living.

First Day of School

I have been anticipating this day for some time now. I printed Ambleside Online’s lesson plans, created a daily lesson plan, and ordered books. I was awake at four this morning in excitement for the day.
I have four children. The oldest, Emma, is seven. She will be starting her second year of school today. I don’t hold to the standard grade system strictly. She has twelve to thirteen years of learning in front of her. This is her second year. If I had to place her in a specific grade at this point, I would say she would be in first and a half grade.

As Emma begins her second year, my other two daughters will be joining in the short group study. I will be reading to them some good storybooks. I expect they will accompany us on nature walks and various activities outside regular book learning as well. But other than that, I am giving them play time.

With the Charlotte Mason Methods, I do not use a large variety of textbooks. Most of the books we use are biographies, books with stories, and classical books. To keep my life simple, I stick to Ambleside Online’s lesson plans and book lists. Until Christmas, we will be finishing up a few books from year one, while beginning year two. After Christmas, she will be completely year two.

Emma’s Year 2 Lessons:

Math: Math-U-See Alpha Single Digit Addition & Subtraction Instruction Book, Student Workbook, Test Booklet & DVD
History: Fifty Famous Stories Retold, D’Aulaire biographies, Our Island Story: A History of England for Boys and GirlsTrial and Triumph: Stories from Church History
Natural History: The Burgess Bird Book for Children (Dover Children’s Classics), Paddle-to-the-Sea (Sandpiper Books), James Herriot’s Treasury for Children: Warm and Joyful Tales by the Author of All Creatures Great and Small
Geography: Charlotte Mason’s Geography, Home Geography for Primary Grades, and Mapping Paddle to the Sea
Copywork: Language Lessons for a Living Education 2 and Scripture Passages
Reading: Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons, Books from Ambleside Online’s Free Read List
Timeline: Continuing to build a personal timeline of Emma’s life
Recitation: Memorizing the Walrus and the Carpenter by Robert Lewis Stevenson
Drawing: Step-By-Step Drawing Book (Activity Books for Little Children)
Handicrafts: Plastic Canvas Art
Piano: Basic Piano Lessons

Group Lessons:
Bible: A variety of Bible Stories, Scripture memorization, Catechisms, and Hymns
Poetry: Book of Poms
Art: John Constable
Language: French and Spanish from Little Pim (available on Amazon Video Prime)
Classical Music: Carl Maria Von Weber
Folk Music: Three a term, starting with Cockles and Mussels
Hymns: There is a Fountain by William Cowper
Exercise: Wii Fit for 30 minutes, or a nature walk
Nature Study: Handbook of Nature Study, National Geographic Kids Magazines, and Emma does a nature notebook

The day went very much how I expected. We accomplished what we set out to do, but it was not without its rough spots, some whining, and there is always the baby fussing and a telephone call. But we did it. We will spend a few days working out the bugs, but it will come together into some sort of system before too long. After a very rough start last year, I quickly learned to allow myself and the children grace as we begin a new school year.

AS AN AMAZON ASSOCIATE I EARN FROM QUALIFYING PURCHASES.

Peanut Butter and Chocolate Ganache Sandwiches

Ingredients:
Peanut butter
8-10 oz. Chocolate
Whipping cream
Bread

1) Put the chocolate in a glass cup. (I usually use a glass Pyrex measuring cup.)
2) Cover the chocolate with cream.
3) Melt the chocolate in the microwave a couple minutes until the chocolate has melted and is smooth.
4) The ganache should have a pudding like texture, a little more cream can be added to get the desired texture.
5) Spread on bread and make a sandwich!
(Toasting the bread can turn this sandwich from a kids lunch to a grown-up sandwich)

My children have yet to like jam or jelly, but peanut butter has always been a great lunch item in our home.

One day, I decided to make chocolate sandwiches as a lunchtime treat for my children. I combined the chocolate with peanut butter to increase nutrients.

Chocolate ganache peanut butter sandwiches have been a popular lunchtime meal ever since.

I know it may seem crazy to give a child chocolate for lunch, but the sugar content is actually far lower than traditional jelly or honey. If I use dark chocolate I can bring the sugar content to 6-7 grams of sugar per tablespoon.

One tablespoon of Polaner’s all fruit strawberry jam with no added sugar contains 7 grams of sugar.

One tablespoon of raw honey contains 17 grams of sugar.

One tablespoon of a traditional generic brand of grape jelly contains 12 grams of sugar.

One tablespoon of chocolate ganache made with semi-sweet chocolate chips contains 11 grams of sugar. If the ganache is made with dark chocolate, 6-7 grams of sugar per tablespoon is possible.

Chocolate is also a very healthy food. It contains a lot of minerals and the cocoa butter is a very healthy fat. So this is a very healthy, yet delightfully fun lunch!

Savoring the Smudges

Six years ago, when my oldest child was still tottering around, we went to visit my parents for a week. As our visit came to an end, I began cleaning up and packing to go home. I noticed my daughter had left hand prints and smudges all over my parents’ sliding glass door. I was about to wash them off, when my Mother insisted I leave them there. A month later, she told me Emma’s smudges were still on the window. She was cherishing them.

Motherhood gets busy, I agree, but as all mothers are aware, the pattering of little feet around the house will someday be gone. Someday there will be no more squeals and silliness. There will be no more little voices constantly asking for food. Children grow up. That is what is meant to happen. That is what I want to happen. But in the meantime, I need to be savoring the moments of little lives in my home, not just trying to get by or make it through the day.

A few years ago, my husband gave me a mill to grind wheat. It was something I had wanted for a long time. I love that mill, and have used it to grind wheat, oats, and flax. It is one of my favorite kitchen tools. What if I never took the time to enjoy the mill? Maybe I decided it took more time than I thought it would, so I loaned it out to others or just stored it in the cupboard, and never enjoyed it myself. Or perhaps, if every time I did use the mill, I got upset because it made a mess, was too loud, or took too long grind the wheat into usable flour. How I treat that mill shows if my heart is truly grateful. If I complain or do not use the gift of the mill, I am certainly not it. My lack of enjoyment in the mill would not only be an insult to my husband who so generously gave me the gift, but I would miss out on the joy the mill brings through the amazing, flavorful, freshly ground grains it provides. Motherhood is a gift. We are insulting our Father who so graciously gave us the blessing of children when we fail to enjoy the little ones He entrusted to our care. Yes, it might not look like what we expected. Children are messy, loud, and require much patience. But they are a gift from God. They are ours to enjoy and cherish for the short season God allows us to hold them close.

Culture is increasingly pressuring us as Christian’s to see children as anything but the biblical blessing they are. Children are perceived as the boss of the home. Children are seen as monsters. Children are limited due to their expense. Having a child is more like a having commodity than a living precious soul. The lives of unborn babies are discarded at will. Children in our culture are not treasured for God, but for selfish reasons of parents. Parents are prideful, selfish, and demanding of children. As a result of unbiblical perspectives on children, parenting is not purposed and done with intent, but coped and “fumbled-through.” If I rest on an unbiblical view of children, I am unable to fully enjoy my children. Not that I have to accompany my children on every adventure, but that I open my ears to the sounds of their squeals during play while I wash the dishes. I also need to patiently, and gently answer to the incessant “mommy.” And every time I wash little prints off the windows, I rejoice in the precious little hands that put them there. Mothering is a sacred, God ordained privilege. “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward” Psalm 127:3.

We mothers are tired. We are stressed. We are full of self-guilt. We are sickly. We are worried and fearful. We are busy. We are frustrated. We are cranky. We are human-sinful creatures. Enjoying our children is something we have to purpose to do, because it is not always a nature inclination. I always wondered why Paul instructed the older women in the church to teach the younger women “and so train the young women to love their husbands and children” Titus 2:4. Isn’t motherly love a natural thing? Why does it need to be taught? As other women have shown me, we love our husbands and children, yes, but how we love our children is what we need to learn. We need to learn the right way to love our children. We need to learn how to correctly show love to our husband and children. The major aspect of showing love to our children, is to simply enjoy them.

How do I enjoy my children? Well, Just like I enjoy my grain mill. First of all, I take the time. I purpose to use it. So with children, I take the time. I purpose times with them throughout the day. We go for a walk, we chat about life during breakfast and lunch, I give them random hugs and snuggles. I purpose to spend time with them in their world. This does not mean I manage them. No, I go with their flow, their serious little conversations, I spend time building a relationship with them, not just being “mom.”

I also pause and take in the moments of my children’s little lives. The sound of the mill grinding away is a happy sound to me. I like to hear the mill as it churns and crunches. So, I keep my senses open to my children. I smell their oily little heads, I listen to their sweet little baby sounds and little voices, and soak in their little snuggles, I stare at them while they sleep.

And yes, the mill makes a dusty mess. But it never once troubled me. I am so grateful to have it. I simply wipe up the mess and move on. So it is with my children’s messes. We clean them up and move on. My relationship with my child is far more important than the mess of an accidently spilled jug of tea all over the kitchen floor. Enjoying my children cannot happen, if I am overwhelmed or frustrated by the messes they make. I can’t allow myself to become absorbed in the mess, but must absorb myself in the joy of raising mess-makers. Children are not always a delight, but we as mothers can consciously work to enjoy them even when they are unpleasant. I have often put my arm around one of my little grumpies and told her that “I love you even when you are grumpy.” I can do that, because of the gospel. Someone choose to love me when I was grumpy. “but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” Romans 5:8. It always comes back to the gospel doesn’t it? I can truly enjoy being the mother of little sinners, all because I am a sinner, and God perused me out of His boundless grace.

As I battle to maintain a biblical perspective on motherhood. I can truly enjoy the blessing of being a mother. I don’t do it alone. I rest completely in the grace and new mercy poured out on my life daily. “The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness” Lamentations 3:22-23. God has bestowed upon my life all the grace I need to do what He has given me to do. “But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace toward me was not in vain. On the contrary, I worked harder than any of them, though it was not I, but the grace of God that is with me” I Corinthians 15:10. It is not my work, but the work of God through me, moment by moment. I can truly enjoy being a mother of sinners, because I delight in My God who rescued me from my sin. In that thought is joy. So today, I am going to wash windows, and rejoice.

Pursuing Health for God’s Glory

My first reason for perusing health is that I have been given stewardship over my body and home. My body belongs to God and to my husband. As a believer I seek to be faithful in all God has entrusted to my care. My stewardship entails a great many things: finances, education, children, ministry, and boy, that is just a few. A good steward wouldn’t squander money wastefully on cheap trinkets, but would save and invest and make wise purchase. Just the same, I should not squander my health by eating unhealthy, smoking, or not being disciplined to exercise. My body belongs first to God. I care for it, for Him, not for myself. By caring for my body, I am enabling myself to serve God better and longer than I would if I did not care for myself and was sickly, weak, and tired. I understand, there are diseases and illnesses we endure, but I am still responsible to care for the body God gave me, not matter what its physical condition is.

The second person I am steward of my body for is for is my husband. On my wedding day, I pledged to be his until death parted us. I am doing my husband an injustice, by not caring for the body I gave him that day. Out of love for my husband, I need to tend to myself so I can think clearly, rest as needed, be as attractive as I am able, and eat, drink water, and exercise in order to be strong and healthy for his sake.

I have also been given stewardship over my household. Since I am the homemaker (a steward of the home), I am responsible for feeding my family and caring for them. Proverbs 31:14-15 “She is like the ships of the merchant; she brings her food from afar. She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens.” As the virtuous woman prepared food with thought and care, I feel it is my job to care about what I feed my family. It takes effort and I need to apply myself to knowledge about nutrition and make wise decisions for the health of my family. Even if that means bringing in foods from afar. I cannot adequately meet the nutritional needs of my family if I am ignorant how to do that. I want to know the ingredients on packages, vitamins in various vegetables, concerns of various unhealthy foods like sugars and fats. It is my job to know what food is in my home, not just blindly trust manufacturers, trying to sell me a product. So, if I don’t know what an ingredient is, I will look it up and learn about it. I am the one responsible for feeding my family, I need to be knowledgeable on nutrition, ingredients, and the nutrients a human body needs to prepare balanced, wholesome meals for my family.

Food is a ministry to others. Having knowledge of ingredients and nutrition has opened doors for me to have people in our home or take meals to people with specific dietary needs and restrictions. Without that knowledge, I would find it intimidating to make a meal for a diabetic friend, and would be far more likely be inclined to do nothing. If I am unable to work with various ingredients, recipes, or create balanced meals for others, I hinder the ministry of my home. Galatians 6:2 “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” Even at home, I am better able to minister to my family by knowing ingredients that will comfort and heal. Such as being able to cook a bowl of bone broth with garlic and turmeric for my sick children, or being able to know what supplements to give my daughter with poor vision development, to help give her the best start in life I am able to give.

Discipline is a crucial part of a life that brings God glory. To be able to be controlled in my personal eating habits or exercise is very important, but I am also training children who have no concept of what to eat and why. I not only teach my children discipline by example, but by limiting their indulgence. If they had their way, my children would live on candy and ice-cream. I must teach my children to be faithful stewards of the earthly bodies they have been given. I want my children to have an idea of when it is time to stop. So, like most mothers, my children have boundaries and limits when it comes to food. I also must take care not to allow myself to be enslaved to anything…even coffee or chocolate. I must be in control of what I eat. “All things are lawful for me, but not all things are helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be dominated by anything” I Corinthians 6:12.

Eating for God’s glory means I don’t eat carelessly. I don’t put food in my mouth for myself, but for His glory. That means I will not overeat, I will not indulge my flesh on tasty things for my sake. And with a grateful I will also enjoy the food God has given. I will not be a food snob. I will use food as a tool to minister to others. And I will also refrain from eating and drinking certain foods if it will cause offence to other Christians. So, absolutely, I will eat foods I don’t believe are healthy, out of kindness to others and for the gospel sake. “So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. Give no offense to Jews or to Greeks or to the church of God, just as I try to please everyone in everything I do, not seeking my own advantage, but that of many, that they may be saved” I Corinthians 10:31-33.

Now a brief disclaimer. I very much understand that a certain body image is marketed in our culture. That “perfect” image should never be goal of Christian women. We simply do the best we have with the body God has given us. Being skinny is not the point. Being pretty is out of the question. We are responsible to the best we can with the body God gave us, even if we have a slow metabolism or diseases that hinder us from our idea of a healthy look. Perusing health to bring God glory is all about the heart, not the body.

My Recipe Book

Shortly after I got married, I began collecting recipes. I had two recipe files for a long time. One was full of recipes with pictures that I had cut from magazines. The other file was family recipes from both my family and my husband’s family. It did not take long for me to realize the card system was ineffective for me. 1) I would pull a recipe out to use and it. But the recipes never seemed to get back in their alphabetical order. So I wasted my time organizing and putting recipes back in order. Or spent unnecessary time looking for specific recipes that were not in order. 2) I found a recipe card file uninspiring. When I planned meals, I had to go through various files and categories to figure out what meals to plan. It was an ordeal. 3) I was not constantly aware of the recipes I had. I forgot good recipes, made bad ones again, and simply spent a lot of time feeling lost in my recipe box. I found books to be a favorite source of recipes. I used Good Housekeeping and the red checkered cookbook for my staple recipes. I also depended on the internet for recipes. The problem with the internet was that I often lost or forgot about good recipes. And I spent a lot of time simply looking. Although I still have a couple of online resources I refer to on occasion: The Pioneer Woman and Smitten Kitchen. I don’t use the internet as heavily as I once did. As I set up house my first year of marriage, there was a lot of experimentation as I learned to cook regularly for two. As I cooked, I began developing my own cookbook for home use. I typed out my favorite recipes, added a picture, a space for notes, and sent it to an office store for printing. Since I created my first personal cookbook, I have created a half-dozen more for friends and family. It is an invaluable method to store recipes. I love my own cookbook because: 1) It is never out-of-order. I don’t have to straighten up my recipe box or find list recipes. It saves a lot of time sorting. 2) Everything is categorized in easy sections with a picture, so I can easily look up the recipe on my mind or flip through the notebook for an idea. 3) I can easily update the book by printing off recipes and slipping them into a plastic sheet protector in the book. I can also remove unused recipes and trash them as needed. So I am never inundated with recipes I don’t use. 4) I can read the typing easier than handwritten recipes. So there are no mistakes due to mis-reading Grandma’s shaky scribbles. Typing is also fast compared to writing out a recipe. 5) I have a place to add notes about changes I might have made to the recipe. Unlike recipe cards that have little room for notes. (I can insert my children’s artwork as well). 6) I cover the pages in plastic sheet protectors so if there is any spill or splatter, my recipe isn’t ruined. I just wipe and move on. 7) I don’t have to worry about sizes. Sometimes recipe boxes can be full of 3×5 cards, 4×8 cards, folded cards, papers, newspaper clippings, and recipes cut from magazines. Those boxes are not without their charm, but they are not efficient and practical for my life. 8) I have all the recipes I use in one place. I now rarely use cookbooks or internet for my everyday basic cooking. If there is a recipe in a certain cookbook that I use frequently, I simply put that recipe in my own book. 9) Recipes people give me, or I discover throughout the year can go directly into my book or I slip them in a pocket in the front cover and update the book at one time. I have used this notebook method to store my recipes going on ten years now. I have no desire to go back to the cards, although I hang onto Grandma’s torn, yellowed, scribbling about of how to make tamales, but strictly for sentimental reasons. 20180824_150848.jpg Continue reading “My Recipe Book”