Category: A Redeemed Heart

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Reclaiming Christmas

It is not even October yet. I know, but my heart is full of joy as I have been pondering the coming King! And it seems wrong to contain it. Let me explain…

I have been doing a study through the book of Luke this fall with my church sisters. It has truly been remarkable. Honestly, the first chapter was so incredible I find my mind hanging out there there still, even though we have moved on to chapter five.

What a rich, beautiful book! Did you know, Luke and Acts are the only books of the Bible written by a Gentile? Luke was a Greek doctor. He was loved, highly educated, and well, that made him a very thorough and thoughtful author of two inspirational books in the New Testament.

Luke begins the story of the gospel with an angel…wait…back up…with the name of an evil, pagan King named Herod. Herod, like so many Roman kings and emperors was completly full of himself. He killed people ruthlessly, including his own children, and as we read later, all the babies in an entire city. He was beyond didespicable.

Four hundred years of ordinary preceeded Herod’s reign. The Jews had no prophecy fulfilled, no miracles…life had been what we would call ordinary. Yet in the ordinary, their hearts longed for their promised Messiah. It was the constant prayer on their lips, and the ever burning hunger in their souls. Some, like, like Anna, who we read about in chapter two, spent their lives praying and fasting for His return!

The priest, Zechariah was no different. So, when God extrodinarily allows him to be chosen to burn incence at the alter one Sabboth, it is no wonder that his prayer would be for God to fill the promise of sending the promised King to deliver.

Here enters Gabriel, the messenger angel who stands in the presence of God himself. Gabriel let’s Zechariah know his prayers have been answered! His wife will have a baby, even though she is barren and a woman who has long passed menopause! A stunning miracle, but not a new one, since Sarah was also given a promised child, Issaac, hundreds of years before.

Yet, Zechariah is skeptical. His response is sarcastic, like, “Really? Prove it!” Instead of jumping for joy, he is not faith filled, but disbelieves what God has just told him.

Sometimes, even though we have been given incredible displayes of God’s power, and grace we struggle to embrace the promises wholeheartedly, do we not? Instead of rejoicing and claiming the fulfillment of God’s promise, Zechariah shakes his head in disbelief. And it even frustrates the messenger from God’s throne standing right before him.

So, God gives Zechariah a sign and strikes him, so he cannot speak or hear. Zechariah lost the privilage of being able to proclaim this wonderful news! But guess what? God did not need him. In fact, God is fully capable of presenting the good news without any of us! It is a complete privilage, to speak the gospel and we should hold as an honor.

That discussion is for another day, back to the story…

Elizabeth, Zechariah’s wife, did get pregnant. She kept it quiet and stayed at home.

Five months passed…

Then Gabriel has another message to share. He appears to Mary, an engaged girl from a podunk town called Nazereth. Now, I was always led to believe that Mary must have been some special girl for God to choose her to be the mother of His Son. But in fact the opposite is true. Gabriel states that she is favored by God because God has chosen her to be the mother of His Son!She is favored and chosen not because she was exceptional in any way. God simply set His heart on her, to use her for His glory!

Well, Gabriel continues to speak to Mary, and tells her that even though she and Joseph are not married yet, and haven’t had physical relations, a baby is going to be put in her womb by God, and she will give birth to Emanuel…God incarnate…naming Him Jesus which means, Savior.

Unlike Zecheriah who struggled to believe Mary immediatly accepts the idea, simply wondering how God is going to do that since she is a virgin. Gabriel explains that the Holy Spirit is going to be at work in that miracle and has already been at work by aiding in her aged cousin Elizabeth’s conception. Mary sweetly responds that she is God’s to do with as He chooses!

We all know an unwed pregnant woman, even in our day, has a hard road before her. But despite the difficulties, and unknowns, Mary is happy to be used of God. How often do we fight the paths God leads us through in our journey of life instead of graciously rejoicing in the fact that we are privileged to walk where He leads?

Mary is so overcome with the news. She packs up immediatly and heads over to see Elizabeth to talk about all of it! She is greeted by Elizabeth, who immediately feels her six month old unborn baby dancing inside her. Even an unborn baby is rejoicing!

Then Elizabeth pours out her joy in exclaiming how blessed Mary is! I can picture this highly filled emotional moment…a fat womb rolling with movement, an old pregnant woman embracing her young cousin, and with tears rolling down all their cheeks, repeating over and over how blessed they are!

Then Mary, bursts out in song worshiping God who has brought this inexplicable promise to reality through her! She magnifies God with every core of her being proclaiming,

“My soul doth magnify the Lord, And my spirit hath rejoiced in God my Saviour. For he hath regarded the low estate of his handmaiden: for, behold, from henceforth all generations shall call me blessed. For he that is mighty hath done to me great things; and holy is his name. And his mercy is on them that fear him from generation to generation. He hath shewed strength with his arm; he hath scattered the proud in the imagination of their hearts. He hath put down the mighty from their seats, and exalted them of low degree. He hath filled the hungry with good things; and the rich he hath sent empty away. He hath helped his servant Israel, in remembrance of his mercy; As he spake to our fathers, to Abraham, and to his seed for ever” Luke 1:46-55.

What complete praise! But it doesn’t end with Mary. Baby John is born a few months later, and his Daddy, Zechariah, you know the one who did not have faith in God’s word? Him. As soon as his tongue is loosened, he too is filled with the Holy Spirit and begins to prophecy! He rejoices without restraint at the good news, saying things he has no idea about, but in simple faith, releasing every joy in his soul at this wonderful beginning of a long desired promise…fulfilled.

As we read on in chapter two we see an entire army of angels proclaiming this good news to shepherds at night. Then Shepherds glorifying and praising God at this thrilling wonder of God incarnate. We see the heavenly star proclaiming the news to kings. An old man, Simeon and an old woman, Anna utterly full of exuberance at finally being able to meet the Promised Messiah they have prayed for for so long!

Then there is me.

1) After such rejoicing, what feeling fills my heart when it comes to worshiping the king? Am I so filled with joy that my worship is unrestrained? Or do I withold worship from my God? He is worthy of my loudest praise in song. He is worthy of my outstretched arms in praise. He is worthy of my proclamation of His kingdom in words, in song, and in every act of my life!

Yet, how often I restrain myself! I put the fear of man above the fear of God. Actually, I put myself and my comfort zone above the fear of God! What an outcry of shame my heart has experienced as I have seen the unrestrained joy of these people in the book of Luke as they welcome the good news of the gospel into their lives!

2) The Kingdom of God has come! Yet, do I fully embrace it? With my whole heart, do I willingly seek what God has for me each day as I walk with the King himself! Do I boldly proclaim my king to my neighbors, to the man sitting on the street corner, even to fellow believers? Do I see myself as blessed because of Him? Do I cherish the privilage to speak of my King?

3) And then there is Christmas. Why in the world am I so fearful of over celebrating it? Maybe it does not come at the exact time of Christ’s birth. But it is the day the world recognizes in celebration of it. Why wouldn’t I want my house to be the brightest, most festive on the street? Angels proclaimed the news of Jesus’ birth from the heavens! Certainly my rooftop is a small space in comparison! Why shouldn’t I guiltlessly throw my heart into the festivities of celebrating my King’s coming to earth? There is every freedom to rejoice in this good news! My fear of being caught up in the commercialism of Christmas has unfortunatly caused me to under celebrate this amazing season! And as a result, I have stifled the outpouring of my rejoicing!

In fact, why reserve this celebration for one day a year? The incarnate God is a major part of the gospel story, so without a second thought, I will be singing “Joy to the World” throughout the year!

Rejoice! Emanuel has come!

My Soul Magnifies the Lord!

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The Love Paradox

We women do all sorts of things in order to fill our bottomless hunger to be loved. A woman will stay in an unhealthy relationship hoping that someday…the man she is with will come to love her. A girl will choose a career path, thinking that someday, her mother or father will be proud enough of her to love her. A woman will tolerate years of abuse in hope that things will someday change and she will be loved. A woman will put her body on display with her clothing, in the hope that by noticing her body, perhaps someone will come to love her heart. A woman will marry and divorce, and marry and divorce, in an endless search to find someone who will truly love her. A mother can even have controlling demands of her grown children, in fear of loosing their love. There is an endless list of things a woman will do for the mere hope of being loved.

When I think of an unloved woman in Scripture, my heart goes immediately to Leah. She was a homely woman, coerced into marrying Jacob by her father. Repeatedly, Scripture points out that Jacob loved Rachel and hated Leah. Leah yearned for Jacob to love her. Each time she had a baby, she hoped the baby would give her favor and love from her husband.

Genesis 29:31-35 “When the Lord saw that Leah was hated, he opened her womb, but Rachel was barren. And Leah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Reuben, for she said, ‘Because the Lord has looked upon my affliction; for now my husband will love me.’ She conceived again and bore a son, and said, ‘Because the Lord has heard that I am hated, he has given me this son also.’ And she called his name Simeon. Again she conceived and bore a son, and said, ‘Now this time my husband will be attached to me, because I have borne him three sons.’ Therefore his name was called Levi. And she conceived again and bore a son, and said, ‘This time I will praise the Lord.’ Therefore she called his name Judah. Then she ceased bearing.”

We are never told in Scripture that Jacob ever loved Leah. In fact, in Genesis 30:14-19 we see Leah’s struggle for affection continue. I am sad for Leah, yet as Scripture unfolds, I see a deeper love story in Leah’s life. God created Leah to look the way she did. God loved her the way He made her. God noticed her, and in her pain of being unloved, God blessed her. It was through Judah, her fourth son, that King David was born, and eventually the eternal King, Christ. Leah was a very loved woman.
Did Leah ever know how much God loved her? There are glimpses through her children’s names that she might have understood that God loved and cared for her. However the question I wonder is if Leah ever found her satisfaction in God, or if she forever longed for the love of her husband. It is one thing for a person to know they are loved with an everlasting love, but that knowledge is powerless. It is only when a woman casts out the idols of her life and rests in God’s completely filling love before can she be completely satisfied and find perfect joy in God. “In your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore” Psalm 16:11.

Looking past Leah, another woman pops up in Scripture. Ruth forsook her idols and found her satisfaction to be only in God. Ruth followed God without an expectation of blessing.

Ruth 1:15-17 And she said, “See, your sister-in-law has gone back to her people and to her gods; return after your sister-in-law.” But Ruth said, “Do not urge me to leave you or to return from following you. For where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there will I be buried. May the Lord do so to me and more also if anything but death parts me from you.”

In leaving Moab and following Naomi and the God of Israel, Ruth not only forsook her gods, but also her family, marriage, and the hope of having children. She completely threw herself, wildly, and unassuming into her faith in God. We continue to see Ruth’s dedication to God through her love and care of Naomi her mother-in-law. And then, Ruth choose to follow God’s command in seeking a kinsman redeemer through her husband’s family’s in Boaz. When Boaz realized that Ruth was sacrificing the possibility of a long marriage for an old man like himself, he was deeply touched and told Ruth, “May you be blessed by the Lord, my daughter. You have made this last kindness greater than the first in that you have not gone after young men, whether poor or rich” Ruth 3:10. Obed, the son of Ruth and Boaz was the grandfather of King David, and in time, Christ, as we know was born from the lineage of David.

Both women, Leah and Ruth were created, chosen, loved, and blessed by God. Ruth followed God, fully aware that the consequences of her choice to follow God could mean a loss of earthly love and earthly relationships. Yet, Ruth was content in God and obeying His commands. Ruth had found that God was more than enough to satisfy. She did not require a husband, a family, children to complete her happiness. God was enough for her.

Like Ruth, Leah was obedient to God. Leah also honored her father and husband. Leah saw God’s hand at work in her life by providing her with children. So, Leah acknowledged that God loved her. But Leah was continually unsatisfied. For Leah, God was not enough. Leah longed to be loved by her husband. I admit it would be a very difficult scenario for any woman. So I do not judge Leah for the struggles of her heart. But I can’t help to wonder how different dear Leah’s life story would have been IF she had pursued her joy in God instead of earthly, faulty, human relationships.

“You open Your hand And satisfy the desire of every living thing” Psalm 145:16.

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Why I am Grateful for Halloween

Both my husband and I were raised not going trick-or-treating. Neither of our parents were supportive of that aspect of Halloween. My family did make pop-corn balls, candied apples, light Jack-O Lanterns and warmly greet our neighbors who were trick-or-treating. Jim’s family probably did less than that.

My husband and I have pondered how our family should engage in Halloween since our first child was born. We have friends and family that take various positions on the issue. Some so completely avoid Halloween they will not even attempt to engage in conversations about it. Others of our acquaintance, complete embrace the day with all its festivities. Most of our friends and family take a more middle ground in the festivities of Halloween and pick and choose various methods of what makes them comfortable interacting with the holiday. I do not debate the subject, because I do see a variety of perspectives. Those who believe it is harmless to dress up and knock on the neighbor’s door for some candy, to those who will have nothing to do with the day and avoid it in every respect. All have valid reasons and I can respect that. But what is right for us? I am not accountable before God for how my friends and family chose to celebrate or not celebrate Halloween, but I believe it is important for our family to have solid reasons for what we choose to do or not partake of the holiday or any holiday for that matter.

My conclusions concerning Halloween are completely based on the Gospel.

For a Christian, Halloween is indeed a harmless day. We are told that Christ has conquered sin and its punishment, death. “He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son,” Colossians 1:13.  “When the perishable puts on the imperishable, and the mortal puts on immortality, then shall come to pass the saying that is written: ‘Death is swallowed up in victory.  O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?’ The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.” I Corinthians 15:54-57. We are no longer a part of this world, we have become supernatural, eternal beings who are not dictated by the evil powers of earth. Because of Christ we are a new creature. Evil things have no power over us. Romans 8: 35-39 “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered. No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Superstition and fear of evil and death are no reason for us to not celebrate Halloween. Christ has given us eternal life and victory. 

It is because Christ has conquered sin, death, and hell, and made evil powerless, that our family chooses NOT to celebrate the holiday. Halloween is a pagan holiday. It celebrates evil things like sorcery, witches, death, and demonic powers. It is a day that is historically and currently known to edify what is morbid. From the skeletons dangling from shop windows to the blow-up witches hanging from the grocery store ceiling, it is very clear that Halloween is a Holiday that celebrates evil and death. There is no power of those things over us Redeemed, but evil still holds on to those who have not been redeemed by Christ’s blood. And for the sake of the gospel, I cannot endorse the Halloween festivities. Out of compassion for the lost souls, I have no right enjoying a holiday that celebrates the horror lost souls face. And celebrating a day that glorifies evil and death is a contradiction of my faith. Yes, Christ has died and conquered any power of such evil. Yet, It is because Christ died to set me free from darkness, that I cannot justify embracing a day that celebrates the darkness from which Christ died to set me free.

Yet, despite the fact my family does not promote or take part of the fun and enjoyable aspects of Halloween, I have no problem using Halloween as a tool against sin, death, and evil. In fact, I have recently concluded that I am very grateful there is a Halloween. When else do the neighborhood children come knocking on my door in mass numbers? What a privilege it is to open it and share the kindness of Christ with them. I admire churches that take a pro-active approach and reach out to the neighborhood with trunk-or-treat and fall parties. Halloween is an amazing tool that we Christian’s can use to the advantage of the gospel, and I am not about to waste that opportunity. So, I am not against methods that wield Halloween to reach lost souls with the truth. After all, what a great time to see someone turn from the darkness of sin and death to celebrating the death of sin!

There is an older lady, who is a dear friend of mine. Her compassion for her neighborhood is an inspiration to me. On Halloween she gives out gospel tracts and shares the gospel message with everyone who knocks on her door. Her desire to reach her community with the gospel is incredible. Halloween is not the only pagan holiday tradition of which she takes advantage. She organizes a community Easter Egg hunt in her backyard every year. She has had dozens of neighborhood children scrambling in her yard to find Easter Eggs, while she uses the eggs and her conversation to share the gospel with them and their parents. She also organizes neighborhood baby and wedding showers for those in her neighbors who are expecting or getting married. Sometimes, she has just opened up her doors a certain time every week for any neighbor lady who wanted to join her for tea and cookies. Her perspective is so mission minded, that the battle of what to do about Halloween is irrelevant. She simply sees the precious children, in need of a Savior, who come knocking at her door one evening out of the year.

That is who I would like to be. And though our children are young, I want my children to also see the souls of others as more important than a holiday they choose to celebrate or not celebrate themselves. I want trick-or treaters to knock on our door. I want to give out treats, so that our house will be the best stop for trick-or-treaters in our neighborhood. I want to draw the lost to my door, so that I can build a report and share the gospel with my neighbors.

Halloween is not a creepy holiday I wish would pass without notice. But it also isn’t a holiday that allows me the opportunity to allow my children to indulge themselves in costumes and candy. Halloween is a gospel sharing tool that comes once a year, knocking at my door.

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Caution in Talking About Heaven and Hell with Little Children

aerial photo of amazon river Photo by Johannes Plenio on

Before I discuss heaven and hell with my children, I want to make sure they have a good understanding of sin and Jesus redemption before we talk about eternal destiny.

I am very catious in my conversations about eternity with the unsaved, especially the very young. I refrain from sharing much about heaven and hell with my children before they comprehend the gospel. I do not want to distract my children from repentance by making them aware of the joys of heaven and the anguish of hell.

It is easy to bring about a false belief in Christ by instilling fear in the heart of people, especially little people. But we must be so careful not to make our children fearful of what happens after death, especially if they do not know Christ. Salvation does not occur if a person’s motivation is, fear of God’s wrath, instead anguish over sin. Our Savior did not bleed and die to save people from hell. No, what Christ died to save us from was far more serious than hell. Christ came to save people from SIN. “She will bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins” Matthew 1:21.
To me, the most important aspect of motherhood is that my children understand the gospel. I would eternally fail as a Christian mother if I encouraged my children in an illusion of salvation, because they once said a prayer with me. I must be aware of my children’s motivation for salvation. Only a person who realizes his or her heart is sinful and need of a Savior to rescue from SIN is one able to be saved.

“As it is, I rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because you were grieved into repenting. For you felt a godly grief, so that you suffered no loss through us. For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death.” II Corinthians 7:9-10

As a result of my salvation from SIN, I am spared the eternal punishment of hell. That is ONLY because Someone Else took on my sin and received the punishment for my sin. “For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God” II Corinthians 5:21.

Charles Spurgeon, in his profound sermon “Mistaken Notions About Repentance No. 2743” published online by Spurgeon Gems, a ministry of Eternal Life Ministries, stated:

“But a sense of God’s wrath against sin is not repentance! It generally goes with it, it frequently attends it—but repentance is a change of mind with regard to sin—with regard to everything and it is a consciousness that sin is sin—that you have committed it. It is a sorrow to you that you have committed it and a resolve, in God’s strength, that you will escape from it—a holy desire and longing to be rid of sin which has done you so much mischief. “

It is essential that my children do not confuse hell with sin, as they come to an understanding of the gospel. Sin is my rebellion against God, hell is simply the punishment for my rebellion. If I overemphasize hell or God’s wrath to my children, I put them in danger of false salvation. My daughter could pray, asking Jesus to forgive her sins, only because they are scared to go to hell when she dies. That would be a very damaging prayer. Clinging to that prayer, rather than God’s grace, would lead her down a life-long sinful path with assumed eternal safety.

Last week, four-year-old daughter, Amber, told me: “I don’t want to be a sinner anymore.” That led to an amazing discussion. Later that week, she told me she had asked Jesus to forgive her. She wasn’t scared of hell, she didn’t want to go to heaven when she died. She simply “didn’t want to be a sinner anymore.” and Jesus was the only way that could happen. I rejoice in her simple, growing faith.

Pat phrases like, “the only way you are going to heaven is to ask Jesus to forgive you” or “Do you know where you are going to spend eternity?” are dangerous. A person cannot truly be saved if they simply want to go to heaven. Wanting to go to heaven, is not being sorry for sin. Wanting to go to heaven, is not wanting to be free from the rule of sin. Wanting to go to heaven, and not wanting to go to hell is not repentance. Not repenting, leads to death. That is not the gospel. There is no salvation if a person is fearful of hell, but not repentant of sins.
“For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 6:23. Sin is our true enemy. Sin is what causes death and hell. Sin should be my focus in speaking of the gospel. My child must be grieved in her heart over her sin. Only in desperation for redemption from sin, can Christ become the ONLY source for freedom and forgiveness from sin. And to think, after granting us that freedom, He will also grant us eternity with Him as His very own child! How utterly incomprehensibly amazing!

“But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Since, therefore, we have now been justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God. For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life. More than that, we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.” Romans 5:8-11

My concern is that fear would be the motivation for my child to want salvation. So that is why I veer away from discussing heaven or hell in depth with my children before they clearly understand that they are a sinner. I want them to truly see themselves as sinners and want Christ to free them from their sin and forgive them, with little regard to what happens after life.

So what do I tell them? We have been to funerals and talked about death and what happens after death. We have discussed what happens to those who don’t know Jesus when they die. I don’t go into depth. I simply let my children know that after death, a believer is with Jesus. Isn’t that heaven?

“So we are always of good courage. We know that while we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord, for we walk by faith, not by sight. Yes, we are of good courage, and we would rather be away from the body and at home with the Lord.” II Corinthians 5:6-8

“I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better.” Philippians 1:23

I also let my children know the opposite is true for those who don’t know Christ. If a person who does not love Jesus dies, they will never be with Jesus. “They will suffer the punishment of eternal destruction, away from the presence of the Lord and from the glory of his might,” II Thessalonians 1:9

Salvation is a true marvel. I never tire of the beautiful gospel message. I love talking about the depths of the gospel, God’s grace, and His glory. I belong to Christ, redeemed by His blood for His glory—-forever.

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The Gospel: Redeemed for God’s Glory

It was a late evening, after an evangelistic meeting at our little Baptist church, when I asked my mother to help me pray to ask Jesus to forgive my sins. I was seven years old. For many years, my understanding of the gospel was very self-centered, but the Lord, in His grace, has given me time to understand the gravity of His choice to purchase my soul for His glory.

As a teenager, I went through an odd spell. Our family moved to Pennsylvania. There we found ourselves in the heart of Amish country. I was enchanted by the plain people who lived without electricity. I checked out every book from our library about the Amish. I decided that the Amish must be very godly because they were unhindered by the world in their quest for being like Christ. I began to dress in long skirts, wear a head covering, and do my hair like Amish people. I felt so spiritual.

How can you believe, when you receive glory from one another and do not seek the glory that comes from the only God? John 5:44

I had deceived myself into thinking my lifestyle was righteousness. I invented my sanctification. I did anything that made me feel like I was close to God. I dressed modestly, attended church, prayed, read my Bible daily, exercised, worked hard to help my family, and attempted to live simply so worldly things did not distract me from growing closer to God. Take away my godly lifestyle and what was there? Certainly not heart resting completely in God’s sovereign grace. If I had been basing my perspective in Scripture, I would have crumbled with awe at the true depth of the gospel. And my pursuit of outward behaviors would have ceased, as I saw how futile they were. I longed to be closer to God. My heart was sincere in its pursuit. But the path I chose only led me away from Christ.

II Timothy 3:5 speaks of people in the end of time who are “having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power.” Anything beside Christ is not the gospel. I might even base my values and standards on Scripture. But that way of living is all me, and not Christ.

One day, as a seventeen year old, I said a little demeaning thing in a condescending spiritual air. My mother took me aside, and in a few words, she addressed my unkind tongue. It left me stunned. How could I have a mouth that said heartless things when I felt so godly? Thankfully, my heart was tender toward the working of Christ in my life, and my eyes were opened to the faults. I began to see the error of my version of sanctification. My lifestyle was a facade. It was a prideful attempt to hide my deceitful, disgusting, corrupt heart. Ephesians 4:22-24 says “to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.” Oh how misleading was my pursuit of God through my own methods! It might not have fooled those around me, but I had certainly fooled myself. My journey to be like Christ had nothing to do with what I did or didn’t do, but everything to do with Christ and my delight in Him. Only in God is true righteousness, not in holding to a certain lifestyle.

Despite the beginnings of change in my heart, I still had years of learning ahead of me. The next step in life was college. I studied a lot of Bible in the Christian University I attended. I went to Bible Seminars. I was surrounded by Christians. I had a lot of amazing people in my life. But people can’t change a heart. I can conform to those around me in behavior, but that is not me changing to be more like Christ. Conformation is not sanctification.

I graduated, and in time, I married. My husband and I moved to the mid-west a couple years after our marriage to help with a church plant. That was the most incredible journey of our lives. We went to help, but discovered that we were the ones who grew and were blessed. The genuine believers in that church changed me.

I had amazing ladies pour into my life. Many of those women are close to my heart to this day. I was challenged in my knowledge, study, and application of Scripture. I finally grasped and fell in love with reformed theology. The gospel became my heartbeat.

The gospel isn’t just applicable to the moment of salvation. The gospel is a constant unending flow if God’s grace poured out on whom He chooses-me for instance. The gospel covers the sins of my past, as well as the sins of my future. My limited perspective of the gospel was enhanced until my life, became wrapped up in the stunning, life-altering, soul-healing grace of God. Isn’t He amazing? It is all about Him. I am all about Him. Not because He saved me, but because He is worthy of my praise, and for some reason He, choose me to glorify Him through His grace. “But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ — by grace you have been saved . . .” Ephesians 2:4–5. I have found such awe in my redemption, I am truly stunned by the grace of the perfect, holy God who became sin for me (II Corinthians 5:21).

After seven years in the mid-west, the Lord moved our family from that spiritually rich church, and placed us among the people of The South. Although, we still struggle with the Christian culture where we live, we have found a church situation that works for us, but we are hungry for more depth, more Scripture, more Christ-centered, gospel saturated believers.

Yet, despite my struggles in the loss of our mid-west church family, it was in The South that my heart grasped the value of God’s glory and what that entails. I learned that:

It is not about me. Humanism, even with Biblical motivations, is still worshiping self. It is sin.

“For they exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen.” Romans 1:25

I was not created for me. I am created for God and for the sole purpose of bringing Him glory.

““Worthy are you, our Lord and God,
to receive glory and honor and power,
for you created all things,
and by your will they existed and were created.” Revelation 4:11

Christ did not die for me. He died for the glory of God. I just happen to be one of the few blessed people He chose to redeem.
I am not redeemed for myself. I redeemed for the Glory of God.

“I, I am he who blots out your transgressions for my own sake, and I will not remember your sins.” Isaiah 43:25

I am a wife, a mother, a home-maker, a fellow Christian for the glory of God. I can ONLY glorify God if I allow His grace to flow through my life as a wife, mother, home-maker, or in anything I do. I do not bring God glory through my own strength, but through His grace.

“Whoever serves, [let him do it] as one who serves by the strength which God supplies – in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ. To him belong glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.” l Peter 4:11

“Now may the God of peace who brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, the great shepherd of the sheep, by the blood of the eternal covenant, equip you with everything good that you may do his will, working in ud that which is pleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory forever and ever. Amen.” Hebrews 13:20-21

“Whoever speaks, is to do so as one who is speaking the utterances of God; whoever serves is to do so as one who is serving by the strength which God supplies; so that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belongs the glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.” I Peter 4:11

I do not live a life for myself, but for the glory of God. God is glorified, when I seek His glory through the gospel, in all I do. Even eating should be done with the purpose of bringing God glory through sharing the gospel.
“So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. Give no offense to Jews or to Greeks or to the church of God, just as I try to please everyone in everything I do, not seeking my own advantage, but that of many, that they may be saved.” Corinthians 10:31-33

I do not study Scripture for me and for my enrichment. I study for God, that He may show me more of Himself that I might be in even more awe of Him. Scripture is not about me. Or His love for me. Scripture is about God. Primarily about bringing God glory through the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work. II Tim. 3:14-16

Eternal life in heaven is not for me, but for the glory of God. I will be able to praise Him eternally without hindrance of sin.

“to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen.” Ephesians 3:21

“The Lord will rescue me from every evil deed, and will bring me safely to His heavenly kingdom; to Him be the glory forever and ever. Amen.” II Timothy 4:8

“That my soul may sing praise to You and not be silent O LORD my God, I will give thanks to You forever.” Psalm 30:12

Everything makes sense with this perspective. Scripture comes together harmoniously. Life in general is not mysterious, but has purpose and answers.

It is an incredible thought that He would allow me even the smallest part or understanding of His Salvation. God did not have to save all people. God did not have to make humans. God did not have to allow Adam and Eve to sin. Yes, God is sovereign EVEN over Sin. Because through our sins, the glory of His redemption is revealed. And through His redemption, we can receive salvation from our sins to enable us to glorify God in Heaven ETERNALLY. Even heaven is not for me. Heaven is for God. Since a lifetime is not long enough to sing the praises of God, He has gifted us with eternity to sing His praises. Isn’t it amazing that a perfect, holy, worthy God decided we could bring Him eternal Glory through the salvation of our disgusting souls?

I have based my entire life and pursuit on the doctrine that EVERYTHING is for the glory of God.

How my life has been transformed by the power of the gospel! Because I was once a broken, disguising soul, chained to sin. Unable to free myself. Unable to even ask for help because my soul was dead! I tried to free myself, but by efforts weighed me down even more. I was a sinner-completely unable to bring God an ounce of glory.

“But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God,” Ephesians 2:4-8.

Now, because of the gospel, the precious blood of Christ, I am able to glorify God, through the grace God gives. Not only can I bring God glory through the power of the gospel here on earth, but I am privileged to glorify God eternally! And it has NOTHING to do with me! It is ALL Him! Glory to God!

Now that is the most striking thing I have ever known. I am dumbfounded.

Thank You Merciful Savior.