Identity: Adulteress -Lessons from Hosea-Part 1

person wearing silver ring with white bandage on hand

IDENTITY: ADULTEROUS

I would like to take a moment to embrace and identify with the word “adulteress.” I want to absorb the feeling of a deep and very personal form of unfaithfulness. I want to get a sense of the pain and destruction that adultery has on a sacred covenant, as it destroys trust and taints intimacy. And oh, the heartbreak, shock, insult, and damage adultery wreaks on lives people as it leaves brokenness in its trail. Adultery has dissolved many a marriage covenant. It has forever changed the course the lives of many within each family it touches. Adultery causes immense pain on multiple fronts. 

It is simple for a woman who is faithful in covenant keeping, to dissociate herself with her adulterous nature. She can pridefully think herself above such a description as adultery, as though she is not a covenant breaker. This is the place I was at as I began to read passage after passage in Hosea. 

I felt for poor Hosea as his life was spent picking up pieces from his ongoing marriage to an unfaithful woman. And then one day, my perception of the characters turned.

It is God who is pictured as in the imagery of Hosea. And it is Gomer who is the analogy of God’s people, Israel. Identifying with Hosea was the course my pride had taken me, when it is most certainly Hosea’s wife, Gomer with whom I should see myself.

Becoming Blind, In Order to See

man sunglasses people woman

I was ten. We were pulling away from our church parking lot. My mother was in tears. She was in a hard moment in her life. I remember her tearful frustration that there was no help offered by church friends. “Is it because we appear to be doing well?” She asked, not wanting an answer. The fact was clear to me that Mom was not doing well. But that was not the kind of well she meant.

My dad was a computer engineer in the 80’s. We were doing well compared to most folks in our small county church who’s income was probably half of my Dad’s.

Our home was a godly home. Back then, we might have been considered to be ultra-conservative sense we didn’t own a television and we home-schooled. We were about the only ones in our church holding to such standards and our family appeared to be a very godly one.

My mother was in-particular a very godly women, rising early and spending hours in prayer and Bible study before the household stirred. We were taught Scriptures, learned how to pray, were faithful to church and in the ministries of the church. Most folks at church probably were not that disciplined. So, spiritually, we were doing well if compared.

My parent’s marriage was in tact and they were both proactive at keeping it that way. Our home was whole. Again, compared to most folk at our small church, that was doing pretty good.

We were all healthy kids. There were no birth problems. We ate healthy. We spent hours playing outside. My parents were also very fit and healthy. For many of our church family, that was not the case due to poor eating, age, and other conditions.

So by all physical standards, were doing well. And because our circumstances looked good to others, why would anyone need to ask my mother how she was doing? Of course she was fine.

Sadly, our family’s success blinded our church family to the fact that we might have needs. My parents left that church when I was about 12. Although we attended a church until all the children in the family had graduated from college. My parents never latched on to church again.

Today, I wonder if part of the cause of my parent’s lack of finding a church family might be traced back to their years of lack of connection to a body of believers who saw their circumstances and not their souls.

Time has taught me that NO ONE is OK. We all have hurts, struggles, hard days. We all need to be inspired and encouraged to grow in our faith. We all need the prayers of others.

Questions for pondering:

Ministry is stifled so often by seeing the physical and not soul of a person.

How many needs are missed? How many souls are lost? How many people are in bondage to repetitive sins in their lives because they simply do not have another soul in their life who cares?

Am I not guilty of seeing the circumastances of a person before their soul?

How often a person’s circumstance blinds me from seeing the cries of her heart?

Do I fail to build connections with certain believers because they intimidate me?

Or because I think we have nothing in common?

Do I tend to travel circles with those I am most comfortable being with?

Do I attempt to connect with people who are very different from myself in age, status, politics, health, culture, or depth of faith?

As I ponder, my heart aches as I think of my Father. He may be yet a lot soul. I have no certainty of his salvation at this point. Would things be different in his soul if he had not been seen as “having it together” in his earlier days? I am left to wonder.

Those in need are not just the obviously destitute. We truly must blind ourselves to the physical circumstances and appearances of others in order to hear them, care about them, and minister to the needs of their souls. It isn’t a natural occurrence either, but must be purposed.

When I started my home with my husband, the Lord put it into my heart to minister without blindness to the souls whatever soul the Lord put on my heart. All are broken. That is how my Savior sees them. So that is how I must see them as well.

I have given aid to dear folks on the street to the happy families of means and found the more invested I became in those lives, the more similar they all were. Putting blinders on to the physical has allowed me to see that all souls are full of needs, sins, and troubles.

One does not have to be well versed in Scripture, wealthy, or qualified in any way to reach out in kindness to someone. I do not have to be a pastor’s wife to send a note of encouragement and some cookies to a pastor’s wife. I do not have to be wealthy to take a meal to a family who could easily afford to order in. I do no have to be a working mom, or even smart, to ask a businesswoman in our church how her week is going. I do not have to have a happy home to bless a family with flowers for their new baby. I do not have to be perfectly well, or even young to reach out with regular conversations to encourage a newly married young woman.

How many neglected heart’s are out there, untouched because we cannot see past a person’s good circumstances and into the soul. We truly blind ourselves to circumstances and look deeper into each dear soul with whom we are connected.

For the Keeping of Christmas

Every year, I find myself re-evaluating how are family practices the Advent season. One might say I am on a mission to make it a deeper and more meaningful celebration each year. I am vigilant to see that the reason we celebrate this season does not get misplaced among the wrapping paper, Christmas cards, and cookies.

Materialism is a struggle for most Christians in the United States. We all are considered “rich” by much of the world’s population. Yet, in our minds, we are not, as we barely make ends meet each month, drowning in puddles of debt and desire.

Other than income tax returns, Christmas can be one of the most materialistic events of the year. I do not want my children to love Christmas because of what toy they are hoping to own by the end of the day. Priceless, eternal moments will be forever lost if that becomes the case.

I want our celebration of this Advent season to be a process of traditions that set our hearts to praise to our Father and stand in awe at the incarnation of our Savior. Our omnipotent God putting Himself in a human body! What an event worth a grand celebration by all of us who partake of the extreme grace that brought Him here!

I deeply embrace celebrating Christmas because of what that moment in time signifies to us under the law of grace. I do desire it to be an exciting and anticipated season in my life and in the lives of my family! I want it to be a time we set aside to reflect and rejoice. Our King has come to earth! It is certainly no small deal.

I am further motivated in my resolve to magnify this season by creating pointed traditions and practices as I study Scripture. Leviticus 23 has been particularly inspirational to me this year. Leviticus describes in detail feasts and sacred days ordained long ago by God for His people.

Feasting is a Biblical form of remembrance and worship: Leviticus 23 describes seven holy seasons that the Israelites were to keep. God wanted them to set aside those specific days or even weeks to reflect on Him in a certain way.

The first sacred day listed in Leviticus 23 is the Sabbath. The second, is Passover. There is also the Feast of Firstfruits, Feast of Weeks, Feast of Trumpets, Day of Atonement, and the Feast of Booths. Other days have been added to the Jewish holidays since then, such as Purim as a result of Esther’s faith.

Each one of those sacred days is for a multi-faceted purpose. First, there is a human need to holding sacred days as part of building and proclaiming our faith. Days to celebrate important events in our faith helps us, ever so forgetful souls, to remember the God we worship as we spend time in celebrating a specific aspect of Him, such as God the Creator, God the Redeemer, or God the Provider.

Second, holy days mark ones faith not only to his or her own heart, but serves as a testimony to other’s of the faith held true. As Christians, our holy days are especially sweet guideposts as we celebrate events that are valuable to our faith-in particular the gospel, those set-apart days remind us of the unearthly kingdom of which we partake. How beautifully days such as Christmas proclaim that our kingdom is of another realm and the events that mark that realm supersede the world we dwell in now.

Third, Holy days help us to spend time to ponder and focus on different aspects of God. For instance, in our celebration of His incarnation we are reminded of the value of the gospel and the longing for its coming. Our hearts are also brought into worship of God as we amaze our souls with specific aspects of His grace.

Fourth, there is an amazing connection many of those ancient feasts have to the gospel. The Passover is incredible illustration. Jewish people have had the gospel plugged into their calendars since they left Egypt! Every holy-day we celebrate as Christians is pertinent to the gospel. At Christmas, we can revel in the fact that the gospel has come. Good Friday and Easter bring us to rejoice in the precious blood that covers us.

Traditions are a Biblical form of remembrance and worship: Back in Leviticus, it is clear that many specific traditions are given by God for the celebration of each feast. Often “rest” is noted as part of the feast. Specific foods are also required at each feast. Offerings are seem to be a regular part of the festivities as well. The feast days were meant to be different than other days, they are special…set apart…holy.

Traditions have long been a part of Jewish culture, but tradition is a very simple way for us humans to celebrate on purpose and with order. Traditions help guide us into faithfulness. They are not evil, despite the bad rapport they get of causing us to become mindless to what is important as we thoughtlessly go through motions. Traditions of faith actually have the opposite effect, if in fact, there is yet a heartbeat within a soul.

Our church celebrates the Lord’s supper every time we meet for worship. It is a tradition. Yes, it can be said that the frequency of sharing the Lord’s supper weekly can make it mundane and common instead of the sweet and savored moment it is. But truly, traditions that relate to ones faith can only be taken for granted if the heart of a person has already become neutral to it. The tradition is not at fault for a person’s lack of heart. Truly if a soul is filled with praise and love of God, such a tradition as the Lord’s supper is never in danger of becoming dull, but will be met with depth of heart and worship week after week.

Traditions are essential to the upkeep of our faith and can be pointedly powerful to stir our hearts in worship to God for the Great things He has done! Traditions are not a man made part of life and celebrations, but a God ordained necessity to the thriving of our souls and purposeful exultation of God.

Christ’s Birth is a major Biblical Event well worth our time to Celebrate. A previous post, Reclaiming Christmas, discusses more in depth with reflections on the book of Luke. Christmas is an incredible joyous event. And like little unborn John, we ought to leap as our souls ponder the incarnation of God.

Most Christians are not of Jewish blood and do not hold to the Jewish calendar of feasts. IN fact other than the Lord’s supper, very few traditions of the Christian faith are held. Even Christmas is often kept more as a family holiday that a sacred holy day.

As I find myself in growing awe of the grace poured out on my soul. I have been challenged year after year that the celebration of Christmas in our home should be more of a sacred event than a holiday filled with empty traditions. I am learning how to use the foods we eat, the gifts we give, the fellowship we hold, and the rest we have as an act of worship and rejoicing. I also seek to add wonderful advent readings and traditions year after year.

Christ’s incarnation is certainly an event we should purpose to celebrate daily, and even as a season we set aside to build MEANINGFUL traditions that could include worship in songs, Scripture readings, candles, advent calendars, rest from regular work, special foods and offerings and gifts as a celebration of our fullness of what He has done.

As a caution if indeed my intent is to set aside the Christmas season solely as a holy celebration of our King’s coming to earth, then I should most certainly prune out any pagan aspect of the sacred day we are creating. Nothing could downplay or be contradictory to our celebration of Christ’s birth, than if I should combine our celebration with gospel contradicting, worldly traditions such as, yes I am naming one, Santa. Certainly the Israelite nation would have destroyed the depth of meaning of their sacred feasts if they chose to include traditions of the pagan people around them. I cannot assume I can keep a day sacred and blend it with elements contrary to the gospel I hold so dearly.

How I strive to build an intentional traditions for the celebration of the sacred event in time I have chosen to celebrate. Such tools as food, gifts, rest, fellowship, song, and traditions can be pointed arrows to hold my heart and the hearts of those within my circle in awe of what God has done. The end purpose being to aid souls in deeper worship of our Savior.

Christmas is after all, essentially, an incredible celebration of the coming of the gospel! Rejoice!

“She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins” Mt. 1:21.

To be Nurtured is to be Known

Early May, I drilled holes in the bottom of a dozen plastic buckets I had picked up from the dollar store.

I placed a few large rocks in the bottom of each container, and filled the rest with potting soil from a bag. In each pot, I planted a tomato seedling. I watered the plants and placed them along the fence outside to grow.

I faithfully cared for my tomato plants, picked off suckers and crawling pests. The plants grew tall and leafy.

Early summer brought blossoms. But the blossoms drooped and fell off without producing fruit.

My fears were realized, the beautiful big trees all over our yard were the culprit. My tomato plants were not getting enough sun to produce fruit. I began moving the plants from place to place throughout the yard in the hope of catching enough sun. No matter where they were placed, the plants were lucky to get two hours of full sun each day. That was simply not enough to produce fruit.

A month ago, after seeing my gardening friends wrapping up their tomato season, I made a final effort to see fruit.

I moved all my plants into our shady sun-room. I popped in couple red LED lights. I added magnesium to the soil and waited to see blossoms appear.

My past experiences with growing plants and gardening has done little to give me any confidence in my gardening abilities.

I admit I am an experimental gardener.  I am not good at growing things and keeping them alive. But I do enjoy the journey of trying to grow things, even if I fail in my endeavor.

Most plants require the same basic care. Nutrients, protection from the elements, disease, and pests, pruning, water, sun, and securing of the stems are essential elements for the care of a tomato plant. Growing a fruiting tomato plant is all about nurturing.

I love the meaning of the word “nurture.” It is far more than providing for needs. Nurture implys a depth of attentiveness, an attention to detail, and forthought. Nurturing is providing every essential need to bring about flourishing.

Nurture also includes the notion of being known before care is given. I cannot expect my tomato plants to produce anything if I do not know enough about them to foresee the needs they have.

The term “nurture.” is a very biblical term. Nurturing relationships pepper Scripture. Nurturing is essential to a wide assortment of relationships such as a husband and wife, parents and children, fellow Christians and even  strangers.

Nothing is so beautiful to me as the nurturing God does for my soul. Psalm 23 comes into my minds as a step by step example of the Lord nurturing His beloved sheep.

The Shepherd knows His sheep so well He can forsee their every concern. Not only does the Shepherd tend the sheep in the moment, but He prepares for the moments ahead by eliminating dangers and making provisions for the future needs of those sheep in His care.

Our heavenly Father wants to see the souls of all who belong to Him not only live, but thrive and bear much fruit.

In John 15, the husbandman tends to the vine in a nurturing way by of pruning in the right season. That is about where I am with my tomatoes. A summer labor and barren yet, flourishing tomato vines grace the corners of my sun-room as October begins. It is time for some plant purging. If one wants to see fruit, sometimes hard steps must be taken. It is all part of the nurturing process.

He tends ever so carefully to our every need, with the goal of the fruit we will bear as a result of His provision of nourishment, pruning, blessing of daily essentials, and protection.

Oh how nurtured I am by my heavenly Father. He knows and loves me. He wants not only what is best for my care, but what is best for my flourishing, flowering, and fruit bearing.

My Father provides everything I need. There is so much peace in God’s soverign work in every detail of my life.

I know that I am growing in the exact environment that is best. I have been given the perfect amount of provisions for my daily needs. No part of of my life is luck or chance.

I am meticulously nurtured in every aspect of my life by my all-knowing, loving Father…for eternity.

13 As a father has compassion on his children,
    so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him;
14 for he knows how we are formed,
    he remembers that we are dust.
15 The life of mortals is like grass,
    they flourish like a flower of the field;
16 the wind blows over it and it is gone,
    and its place remembers it no more.
17 But from everlasting to everlasting
    the Lord’s love is with those who fear him,
    and his righteousness with their children’s children—
18 with those who keep his covenant
    and remember to obey his precepts. PSALM 103:113-18

Sweet Spoonfuls of Injustice

The little one is in bed napping, the older girls are busying themselves with activities for quiet time. I grabbed a small quart of chocoalte ice cream from the freezer…mommy gets a treat this afternoon!

One by one, each of my daughters caught me, asking for a spoon of ice cream. When told that they could not have any, I was met with the response, “But that is not fair!”

I could have answered by reminding my children of the cookie they had enjoyed after lunch. Or told them that the ice cream was too expensive to share. I could have laid out for them the events of my day…all the work I had done and how I was entitled to a few spoons of chocolate ice-cream. I have given such reasonable responses to my children in the past, but today, that is not what poured from my lips.

Today my heart felt it was time to plant a perspective in my children’s’ hearts, that the Lord had been working out in my own heart. “

“Honey, It is okay. It is okay that things are not fair. And you know what? you can be okay that mommy can have ice cream and you cannot.”

They left in thought. There was no planned come-back for that idea.

I want my children to know that feeling injustice is not only normal, but it is okay. I think my eldest daughter might have even pondered further as to why it might be okay for mommy to have a bit of ice cream and why it was okay that she did not get any ice-cream. Perhaps she came up with some very sensible reasons herself.

I know that accepting injustice in our equal and fair driven society is very much a foreign thought. Our culture idolizes fairness.

From a very little age, children play games in which everybody wins. Equal treatment is expected, and when not given, demanded. Teenagers spend hours arguing with parents about what is fair in having a cell phone, dating, curfews, what to wear, or driving privileges. Our perspective of justice is based upon what is perceived as “the norm.” Being forced to live outside that box of “norm” is injustice.

But looking into Scripture, this is where we Christians must divide with our culture. Our fight for personal equality and justice takes on a different meaning in the light of the gospel.

1. We know that fairness will never exist in this fallen world. Indeed, we can make strides for equality; for justice, but it will never be attained.

Because of the sinful nature of man equality is not able to be obtained and someone in must give up his or her own justice in order to bring peace. Our earthly form of justice often is more of a win/loose situation than win/win. And how familiar we are with how justice for one person intrudes upon the justice of another!

What a mother deems fair in an unwanted pregnancy takes away what is fair and just for an unborn baby.

What one parent may say is fair in a divorce, robs the other parent from being with his or her child. And what about what is just and fair for the child who rarely has a choice in the matter…

What one hard-working person may say is fair in a promotion is unfair to another co-worker who is equally qualified.

In truth, we all want to be treated well and we want what we see as best. Fairness is the word we often utilize to get what we feel is best for ourselves. Because of our self-loving, sinful natures, fairness, equality, and justice are completely perverted.

I have a haunch, if it were even possible to live in a world that was impeccably just in every way, we would still cry out from our own perceptions…”That is not fair!”

“Liberty and justice for all,” is truly a worthy goal, but we must learn to be at peace, that until the Christ comes to rule this world, such a goal cannot be attained, only striven for.

2. For Christians, the gospel is priority. It is so easy for everything to seem more important than what is most important. I have been at fault for getting caught in a noble cause and completly neglecting the power of the gospel.

Only the gospel has the power to change the world.

When Christ came to earth, the Roman empire was in rule over many nations, including the Jewish people. The Jewish people in Christ’s day longed for their Messiah to come and set them free from the unjust rule of the Roman Empire.

To the Jews surprise, their Messiah did not come to set them free from Roman rule. Christ’s purpose was not a temporary one, but an eternal. Christ did not come to set human captives free from their masters, but to set the souls of men free from the captivity of sin!

How, we in our day, fail to grasp the horrors that the captivity of sin brings to the human soul! It is truly the worst plight of humanity.

Man’s inability to fulfill his created purpose to bring God glory in a relationship with his Creator is a far greater desperation to all injustices among mankind. In fact, it is even the cause of all the troubles of the world.

Trying to bring change to the world apart from the gospel is like slapping a bandage over a spreading Melanoma. The skin problem can look like it is non-exsistent, but it is far from being cured until it is killed to the very root.

Yes, we ought to fight for what is biblically right. Every bearer of God’s image must be treated with sacred dignity. But we gravely fail in our quest for righteousness if we strive to bring change apart from the gospel. So as we walk about in this dark, unfair world, we, who believe in the redemption brought about on the cross are under every obligation to share it with our fellowman.

3. Our idea of what is just and fair is not same God’s, because our perspective is not the same as God’s. My warped, self-focused heart is tempted to put God into my little box of “my view”, instead of seeing Him as Scripture describes as utterly sovereign, holy, and in complete authority. Even in the choosing of those He would and would not redeem. How dare I think that my code of fairness is better than God’s!

Praise my Redeemer! HE DOES NOT BOW DOWN TO MY VIEW OF JUSTICE!

“For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh but made alive in the spirit,” I Peter 3:18

My heart was once against God. It could do nothing righteous. Even the little goodness I thought I did, was disgusting in comparison to the absolute perfection of my Creator. My path was my own, not God’s. I could pretend it looked like God’s but it was a false identity.

“For all of us have become like one who is unclean,
And all our righteous deeds are like a filthy garment;
And all of us wither like a leaf,
And our iniquities, like the wind, take us away.” Is. 64:6

As a result of putting myself on the throne of my life, the God who made all things-Who put each atom together with a word-had every right to obliterate me.

In fact, He has every right to consume all His self-worshiping creation. That would be completely fair…completely just. Governments in our world are completely understood in their prerogative to destroy anyone who dares usurp rule over them or attempt to harm to their kingdom in any way.

What did God, the Creator-King of all mankind do? He made a way for me, to be in sweet, blessed communion with Him. I can come to Him, without fear, to the very throne room. How did He do that? By exchanging the place of where I should be with His Son. So instead of destroying me, punishing me, and condemning my life and soul to eternal destruction. He destroyed His only, absolutely perfect Son. He condemned His Son. His Son is the One who was forsaken. Christ experienced all the worst of God’s wrath, for me.

NOW THAT IS THE GREATEST INJUSTICE-that is the gospel.

Tears fill my eyes at this thought.

My sinful, rebellious heart deserves nothing but God’s wrath. I deserve death. I deserve to eternally waste in hell. I deserve every miserable thing in life.

But that is not what I have been given. I have been given mercy. I have been given grace. I have been given forgiveness. I have been given an eternal inheritance in the very kingdom I once despised.

And yes, to my dear children, it is completely unfair that I should enjoy even a spoonful of ice-cream.

“Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good!
    Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!” Psalm 34:8

Something Beautiful in a Broken World

Photo by Mario A. Villeda on Pexels.com

 As I look at the current events in our world, my innards ache. This hurts.The moment the created rebelled against the Creator by making mankind himself his own god, the earth began to feel the pain, today, thousands of years after its creation, the world’s contractions bring pains harder and closer together as it waits for renewal.I would like to say earth is in a worse state than it has ever been in history, but I must remind myself that when the earth was only a thousand years old, the entire animal and human populations, except for one family of each, was completely wiped out by a flood because humanity had become so vile.Not even a hundred years ago, our world experienced one of the most horrific events of racism ever known. Over six million Jewish people…men, women, and children were slaughtered. Like many others today, we still shudder with horror at the thought of what occurred. Could that many people have really been killed? Could humanity be that terrible? Horrible wars, plagues, slavery, and violence have been the course of earth since that day humanity brought the curse of sin upon all creation. If we know anything, history has yet to be a teacher to the human race, but history is most certainly the revealer of our true human nature. It is not good. In fact it is desperately wicked.Yes, we are that terrible. And so blind to ourselves that we did not learn from that point in history. This year, there is more unveiling of the injustice and cruelty of which humankind is capable. We are also getting to experience anger and expressions of long harbored bitterness as it pours out of broken people. People’s hearts are hurting them. The souls of the human race are damaged, wounded, and trapped in despair.And then, through these dark thoughts, something is there, waiting, giving time for healing, it is gentle, patient, and sustains the soul. It’s rays burst through the window of any heart’s dungeon. GRACE–it pours into the darkest corner and illuminates the darkened soul. However deep a person can go, grace is already there. No matter how damaged a heart is, grace can heal. However long it takes for repair, grace is waiting. The world can change. People can be whole. Souls can be healed. There can be peace on earth..true peace that comes from a heart drenched in grace. Racism, murder, injustice, slavery, imprisonment, and all the pains of will end.Grace is so beautiful. We as a human race have done nothing to earn grace. We are a mess. This world doesn’t deserve one ounce of grace. We deserve to be left to our own demise, which if allowed would have led to the extinction of humanity thousands of years ago.Instead of getting what we deserve,GRACE reaches down,waits, and          ever so gently,ever so kindly;         So full of a deep compassion,GRACE pleads with us to repent.“He does not deal with us according to our sins,
    nor repay us according to our iniquities” Psalm 103:10.Grace brings us God entering into a body like ours made of perishable dust. Grace brings us God, setting aside the dwelling of which He is worthy, and being wrapped in swaddling clothes and sleeping in a barn. Grace is God, walking among men, homeless, sleepless, hungry, and physically spent as brought understanding of a kingdom far greater than the broken one on earth that humanity keeps trying to mend in all the wrong ways. Grace is God, perfect, holy, and unapproachable by man, being torn apart and killed by the very people He created. Grace is God, using his own blood to make a way for us to repent and find forgiveness with Himself. Grace is God giving us Himself the only perfect, whole, and unimaginable being to bring wholeness and healing to our souls. Grace brings us the gospel. Healing, restoration, peace…All the pains we endure in this cursed earth have been carried, born. It is all ON HIM. And the tears flow from my eyes freely as I realize my own brokenness and the grace poured out on my soul. 

“Surely he has borne our griefs
and carried our sorrows;
yet we esteemed him stricken,
smitten by God, and afflicted.
But he was pierced for our transgressions;
he was crushed for our iniquities;
upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace,
and with his wounds we are healed.
All we like sheep have gone astray;
we have turned—every one—to his own way;
and the LORD has laid on him
the iniquity of us all.” Isaiah 53: 4-6.

Sin abounds. Indeed we are a shameful mess. We see the mess in the news. We see the mess in our governments. We see the mess on the streets. We see the mess in our homes. We see the mess in our churches. We see the mess in our very own souls. Sin abounds…yes…But grace abounds more.“For as by the one man’s disobedience the many were made sinners, so by the one man’s obedience the many will be made righteous.Now the law came in to increase the trespass, but where sin increased, grace abounded all the more, so that, as sin reigned in death, grace also might reign through righteousness leading to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” Romans 5:18-21And I realize it is I who have been in error. All this time, I have been hopeful that things would get better, that healing would come to our people. I find myself frustrated and continually surprised when things seem to get only worse and worse. But I must ask myself, why does any sin surprise me? Why do I feel taken aback? Speechless…? Did I really expect better from people so damaged by sin? Why does it startle me when the hatred the human race has for each other continues from generation to generation? Why am stunned by what people say about each other? Why does it astonish me to see the throbbing pain we humans inflict on other humans? This is human nature is it not? Are not the souls of all humanity broken? Why does sin and the pain it brings continue to shock me?What should stagger me is that the Creator, who made this world beautiful and perfect, allows it to continue in its unraveled state. What should amaze me is that despite our abounding sins, God withholds judgment. Despite our inclination to be our own god, the God who made us, lets us exist. Despite our ignorance and misunderstanding of who God is, we breath in and out. Despite all we are, God waits…giving us time to change, to repent, to come to Him for complete restoration and healing. This is grace. Grace is God’s gift to us. We are unworthy of all grace brings, but it brings it anyway. Sin should never shock us. We should expect sin. We are, after all, sinners. It is God’s grace that should shock us. His grace should so utterly amaze us that our hearts live in the glow of our complete awe of Him. 

The Ministry of Touch in the Home

Photo by Linnea Herner on Pexels.com

Touch connects us to our surroundings. Touch is what makes everything real. Thomas, a disciple of Jesus refused to believe that Jesus was truly alive until he saw and touched his Master. “So the other disciples told him, ‘We have seen the Lord.’ But he said to them, ‘Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails, and place my hand into his side, I will never believe'” John 20:25. So many things we hear about are far less real to us until we see and touch them. Touch is how we experience reality. We humans are strongly connected to the physical world through our sense of touch.

Have you ever sat on your foot and realized you have cut off the circulation to it? Although you can see it, it is very difficult to orient where your foot is in the world. Yes, it is still attached to your leg, but it feels unfamiliar and awkward. It nearly impossible to even to take a step until the nerves in the foot have recovered. It is times like those that we realize how important our sense of touch is! Without feeling, we cannot even connect to the floor.

Some people struggle more than others with where they are in relation to the world. And some people struggle more at different times in their lives.

People who struggle with connection to the world are many and it is good for us who minister with our homes to be aware of people who might be in extra need of tenderness as they are in our home.

Older folk are weaker in body and have slower reflexes, balance, and a nervous system that is often concentrated on bodily pain. For many older folks, connecting to surroundings is crucial to keep from stumbling. They also live in a sense of feeling misunderstood, and disconnected with others as their mental and physical states slows down. It is needful for us to have things for older folks to grab onto..handrails on steps, a bar by the toilet and in the shower (especially if we have long term or frequent elderly folks staying in our home). For short term older visitors, such accommodations may not be necessary, but we should be conscious of placement during seating. I have found a chair with two arms is often easier for an older person to get out of, rather than a plush sofa. So, we could kindly direct our frail guests to the safer furniture in the room if they should prefer it. When my aging parents come to visit, my Daddy often prefers sitting on the floor to a sofa, it is less painful on his back and easier to get up from. Sometimes, elderly folk need a firm mattress because they cannot get out of a bed where they sink in too far. It is good just to be mindful of the things our weaker friends and family may find helpful to grab or rest.

Other people who may struggle with bodily awareness in this world is anyone who struggles with a physical or mental condition. Nerves can simply be wired inside the body in a way that causes weakness, numbness, discomfort, dizziness, uncoordinated, and mental strain. Various nerve re-wires can occur in multitudes of ways, sometimes before birth, from an injury, disease, hormonal imbalances, medications, or even high amounts of stress. We should be sensitive toward those in our home who might need a little extra physical connection, or a little less physical connection. This isn’t always easy to know with new friends, but it is something we should learn about others quickly so we can adequately minister to their souls in our home as best as we are able.

All children struggle exponentially more than most adults with their connection to the world because a child is not only continually growing, but still developing bodily awareness. No wonder a child will stumble and fall countless times a day. As a keeper of the home, showing grace over accidents is invaluable. Milk spills, bowls break, and ankles twist when a person’s height increases an inch over a month’s time. It is also crucial that I reach out to these little souls who are still developing a spiritual awareness and wrap my arms around them. They need snuggles, kisses, and hugs to thrive in their lives and to feel not only my love poured out on them, but learn to connect better to God as they experience the unconditional, sacrificial love of another real human being holding them tight.

As a wife, making a point to reach out to my husband in touch is crucial. As a married couple, we are sharing the most amazing connection a human can have with another. We are one person. It is hard for either of us to feel like one beating heart, if our hands never hold each others hand. We married folk need to be physically close…we pass each other in the hall and connect with a kiss.  I have incredible power to minister and bless the soul of my husband by simply stroking his hair. He can calm my troubles soul with a long, understanding hug. Physical touch has a powerful way of binding souls together, and love language or not, touch is absolutely essential in marriage.

The sense of touch is essential to all humans. I believe people who did not grow up in a nurturing home, truly struggle all their lives with relationships. Relationships and people are not real because through childhood a person had little to no hands on connection with a person who loves them…no snuggles, no hugs and kisses, no pats on the back or brushing away of tears. No wonder relationships seem unreal… disconnected. Those who live alone may go for weeks, even months without ever connecting with another human through touch. I was told by a dear friend who ministers in nursing homes, that the elderly are particularly left untouched, and a hug means more to them than life itself. Those of us mothers who are surrounded by young children in constant need of affection can easily take for granted the connection we have to other people.

As part of developing a nurturing environment in the home for soul to find rest and joy in God, I find touch is crucial. Contact with other humans is not the only aspect of touch that should be considered. I noted a few ways I like to consider the affects the sense of touch might have in our home as I continually seek to use the home as a tool to minister to the soul and bring souls into a place of worship and deeper understanding of their loving Father.

Human Touch is probably the most important form of touch in our home. Why does a child in distress run to his Mama? Yes, a verbal consolation may take place, but what is really needed is a spot on Mama’s lap and Mama’s arms wrapped around his sobbing body. He needs touch to help heal his sad heart feel better, and he knows it. We don’t really try hard to connect with our children with snuggles, hugs, and kisses. It has always come very naturally for both myself and my husband. Honestly, I can’t stop kissing those sweet chubby cheeks! But I do notice that if I am having a busy day, I am less prone to try to reach out to my children’s emotional needs through a cuddle. It is hard for any mother to jump into affection when her mind is busy checking lists. So, I am certainly working on being aware of my children’s needs even when stress is high in our home.

A hug, a pat on the shoulder does so much to bring comfort to souls. A touch says, “I acknowledge you are real and what you are going through is real.” A touch says, “I see you.” A touch says, “I am here, I am a human with you.” A touch says, “you are not alone.” The power of human contact has been studied extensively. It is incredible the affect it has on the development of a new-born. Touching people brings people together in a way that nothing else can do. People need to connect with each other through the physical world of touch. Touch allows us Christians to open gentle pathways with other humans from this real physical world of senses, to the real world of eternity that cannot even be imagined.

When we have guests over we make a point to connect with them, a handshake for the guys and a shoulder hug for us women is a typical greeting in our culture. It welcomes our friends and makes them felt “seen” as well as provides that connection to them in our home. Without it, they might feel a little lost. There have been times I have missed that moment in our greeting and felt a discomfort as our guests try to feel out where there place is in our home. When there are large groups or several families gathering, it is easy to let greetings slide as people come and go and I get caught up in the kitchen or another conversation. This is an area I am still working on, but certainly I am trying to purpose to greet each guest…even each child (Little Who’s Are People Too) as they come in the doors of our home.
Creature affections are probably the next best thing to human affection. We have a sweet outdoor cat. I know many folks find their spirits are greatly soothed by simply petting a cat. A puppy will probably be in our future. Part of the reason for a dog in our home would be for touch. A good dog will invite touch and acknowledges others by showing unbiased affection through the sense of touch. Animals are great at soothing our souls and providing companionship and someone to talk to for those who live alone. Yes, they can be maintenance, but very often, it is worth the time and expense for the way a creature can be a blessing in the home. I have couple friends who have had a serious head injury. As a result, their doctor prescribed a pet to help relieve stress and help them recover. The main reason a doctor prescribes a therapy animal is touch. By coming into contact with another living creature, stress is relived and nerves are soothed. Touch is very grounding.

Heat and Cold should be set comfortably. I find as I grow older, my body temperature changes. Babies and elderly folks tend to need the house a little warmer than the average individual. When we have guests with very young or of grey hair, I make sure to add extra blankets to the bed, or at least point our guests to where they can get one. Keeping the house comfortable, not too hot or cold is helpful as we converse with others, it is one less distraction we and those we converse with have as we fellowship.

Warmth can also be a very sweet feature in the cold of winter. The warmth of a fireplace or a soft robe or blanket. Helping our friends and family members snuggle and find rest in tje warmth of the home can bring some treasured chats over cups of warm cocoa.

Cold, of course is welcomed in the heat of summer. Iced lemonade, a soft breeze through an open window, or ice-cream in a cone…I find offsetting the season with colder treats somehow brings balance.

Earth and nature are very important to touch. I love to see my children run barefoot through the grass. It seems so natural…real. There are studies on the subject of connection to the earth with our bodies. One of my favorite author’s, Charlotte Mason, notes that it is important for children to run and play outdoors as much as possible. Besides blossoming their imagination and love for learning, being outdoors helps children to develop coordination, strong bones and muscles, and learn where they are in relation to the world, simply by placing their feet on the ground for hours a day. . . or up a tree… Grounding brings confidence, peace, and ease. We need to touch earth, plant something, walk in bare-feet, picnic on the grass… I find touch essential to my soul. I personally need to take the time to connect with the rest of the creation God made. I need to take time to feel the wind blow across my face, the warm sun hit my back, the wet morning grass lick my feet, and mud ooze between my toes. A homemaker can garden, plant things, play with children in bar feet, picnic, and make time for enjoying the feel of all God made and sharing that with others. We grownups need to rejoice in the earth God made, just as much as a child does. It makes my heart fill with awe as though God Himself is reaching out and touching me through His Creation. 

Touch is the gospel. Touch is humanity. Touch is God coming to us in a human form. Touch is God healing our souls.

The Ministry of Scents of the Home

I have always been rather sensitive about smells. When I was pregnant, those sensitivities would escalate to the point I wanted to crawl out of my skin to even take out the trash. Once when I was pregnant, we had dead possum under our porch. The horrible smell leached into our basement and then into the entire house. I found it unbearable to the point I packed up the children and left the house for the day. When my sweet husband came home and saw my distress, he removed the porch floorboards and shoveled out the rotting possum. Then he poured bleach over the entire area. Without the consuming horrid smell, my heart was again at peace.

Smell has a greater affect on our hearts than we realize. Potent, stifling smells can be very stressful and make us want to run as far away as we can. Warm, welcoming smells of stewing applesauce and fresh bread, vanilla and spices, or even a clean, crisp lemon scent can set a tone that makes our hearts be at peace and want to stay a while.

Within the home, creating inviting scents and working to keep unpleasant odors under control is therefore essential in preparing a platform for ministry to happen within our walls. The sense of smell, is therefore a wonderful tool I can use in my pursuit of creating a home environment the welcomes spiritual growth and joy in God.

Pay attention to the smells of the home. So often we become accustomed to smells within our walls, that other people might find foreign or uncomfortable. As much as I enjoy fish, I am careful to chose the nights I will cook it. If I am expecting company after dinner, fish will not be on the menu. Although it does not have an odor I find appalling, for many people, the smell of fish is extremely potent and unpleasant.

Animals that live in the home can also make a home smell. It is important to keep indoor dwelling creatures clean and the places they hang out washed and freshened regularly. We do not have an indoor cat, but have kept ours indoors during certain stages of his life so I know that if there is a cat in the house, the kitty littler should be in a room that is tucked away from the rest of the living space…a laundry room, sun-room, or closet where a door can be shut on the ever present odor.

There various are smells that are built into the walls of our home and therefore a constant that we must work to mask or continually re-eliminate. We lived in an old farmhouse for a few years and it always had a very musty smell. In the room above the wet basement, was a den with wood paneling on every wall. I found rubbing that wood paneling down with a mixture of cinnamon oil and coconut oil made the house smell fabulous for weeks.

Carpets and walls may hold in smell from ourselves or even previous dwellers. while fresh paint often takes care of the walls, carpets can be far more difficult to deodorize. Despite the wide market of products on the market, the smell will keep coming back. I recently invested in a carpet cleaner for our current home and it has made a big difference in freshening up the carpets on occasion. Baking soda sprinkled on the carpet and left overnight can be helpful. But powdered products are awfully hard on the vacuum cleaner, so they shouldn’t be used except in extreme cases. For me, just keeping a regular carpet cleaning is the best move. I have sprinkled peppermint or lavender oil on the car carpets and car-seats from time to time. That doesn’t eliminate bad orders, but can cover them up in a natural and pleasant way.

If at all possible use natural scents in the home. This is an area that is still in progress for me. I love to burn candles, but finding candles that are safe to breath hasn’t always been a priority because of the cost and accessibility. But after having a guest with sensitivities to a candle I burned, I will at least do my best to burn a naturally scented candle when we have visitors.

I already clean with natural products as I discussed in the post, Household Cleaning on the Cheap, Practical, and Natural. Cleaning products are certainly a vital area we homemakers need to watch. Many products we use daily and  weekly, are not only toxic to breathe, but can cause severe allergic reactions to some people. I want a home that has air as safe to breathe as I can am able to create.

Chemical scents are often loaded into laundry as well. Guests with allergies would be unable to stay with us if I wasn’t careful about the products I use in laundry. My husband is also one of those who is sensitive to laundry softeners. So, if I must include softener in my laundry, I am careful to get one that is natural and hypoallergenic…yes…and unscented. But laundry doesn’t have to be boring. A few drops of lavender oil on a rag can brighten up the smell of hot clean clothes tossing in the dryer. I also LOVE a laundry line. Read about that more in my Laundry on the Line post. Nothing has a more amazing scent than line dried sheets and clothing!

I am very opinionated on the subject of plug-ins and sprays that are made to make a room smell good. They can be incredibly overpowering and in fact even though they might not stink like a dead possum, they make many folks…like me…gag. I find the artificial smells overpowering and believe many others do as well. Instead a diffuser with a favorite blend of essential oils, a few spices in a pot of simmering water (or mini crock pot), a naturally scented vanilla candle, fresh flowers, potted plants, or even a batch of freshly baked bread can make a home smell incredible without concern of causing anyone discomfort.

Cleanliness is vital to maintaining a home without bad odors. One of the most effective ways to keep a home smelling pleasant is simply to keep it clean. Some of the most notorious bad smells in the home are poopy diapers, kitty litter, and un-emptied trash cans.

My children collect trash throughout every room in the house on a daily basis. I empty those baskets in the kitchen trash, and take it out to the trash bins outside. Baby diapers get wrapped tightly in a special bag to lock in the smells, or they get put in a diaper bin. Kitty litter should be changed daily to prevent it from any odor. I already discussed carpets, but carpets and wood can absorb smells.

Wood is like skin, when it is warm and humid it opens up and releases all those lovely or less lovely smells. Wood floors and paneling can be cleaned with a gentle soap and water (I favor Murphy’s oil). Then the wood can be nourished with a simple blend of a cheap oil like sunflower oil and a few drops of an essential oil. I like to rub oil into the wood just after it has been cleaned with warm water.

Dust has a smell. Have you ever turned on a heater the first brisk day of fall and smelled the dust getting hot? Well, imagine a layer of dust on blinds, furniture, or framework. Being faithful at wiping off the dust can be very helpful in keeping a room smelling fresh.

Appliances can hold odors as well…dishwashers, refrigerators, freezers, microwaves, vacuum cleaners, and washing machines need to be cleaned as well. Appliances should all work without producing any bad odors. For tips on how I clean, check out how I use baking soda and vinegar in my home in My Household Friend: Baking Soda and The Role of White Vinegar in My Home. And just a thought…if you have a vacuum cleaner that has a dusty smell even after it has been emptied, it is time to ditch it and get a new vacuum. A vacuum cleaner should function without any smell.

Fresh air is a wonderful way to keep a home smelling good. Open the windows in the spring and fall can really help air out the house and keep fresh air rotating. The smell of fresh air naturally soothes my mind and a the smells of flowers, soil, and trees give my heart thoughts of God’s goodness.

Prepare for bad smells. The bathroom is a place where bad smells occur. It is a great idea to keep a plan on hand to mask unpleasantries to noses. A bathroom spray or a match are very effective and should be kept available for guests as well as ourselves to use as needed. When we have guests, keeping a candle burning in the bathroom is an easy way to remove the potential of embarrassing smells. If possible one should also make sure there is a way for air to circulate within a bathroom by keeping a vent or window open a crack at all times.

Bad odors can also occur in the kitchen. Even kept clean, a fridge can breed odor. A box of baking soda is a helpful odor absorbing product to keep in freezers and refrigerators. I simply punch a few holes in the top of my baking soda box and put the whole box in the back of the refrigerator and freezer. The kitchen trash should be emptied daily. Our trash is emptied more like 2-3 times a day. Burnt foods should be disposed of outdoors as quickly as possible. If you are planning to do a project inside the house that will involve paints or chemicals, plan those projects on warmer days if possible so windows can be opened for ventilation.

The sense of smell enhances all of our other senses. Because of smell, food has taste, flowers have freshness, and a walk in the woods is so refreshing. Smell is like salt to our sense of sight, hearing, touch, and taste…perhaps it could be lived without, but life is far better with a sense of smell! As a homemaker, I certainly try to put smell to good use to enhance the overall flavor of my home into a place that nurtures our souls and opens pathways for our heart to rejoice in our Creator.

The Ministry of Taste in the Home

Food thought a very temporal and tangible substance has incredible spiritual implications and is essential to the life of the body, and theretofore the life of the soul within the body. The sense of taste, is therefore an essential ministry we homemakers need to study for use in our home.

Foods served in each home very much reflect the culture and lifestyle of that home. As the post, Ministering Through Physical Senses in the Home describes, there is no right or wrong on the matter, we each will make foods we serve based upon our upbringing, who we married, allergies, time constraints, nutritional needs and eating habits, as well as our level of joy and comfort in cooking.

In biblical times eating was not only treasured during fellowship with others, but various foods and feasts held specific symbolism. Our constant need for physical nourishment is symbolic of our need for constant spiritual nourishment. Taste can open up incredible pathways for our spirits to be nourished.

Food provides opportunities for fellowship and spiritual conversations with our own family as well as with friends and un-churched folks. How often our own family has lingered around a dinner table as we discuss a topic of our faith. Or in small group, food is an avenue that allows us to ponder our faith and lives together as we share a snack together after Bible study. Food slows us down and gives us a reason to linger a moment with others. Even a simple cup of tea is all that is needed to pause in life, to be still, alone or shared with others.

I try to keep a balance of eating habits in our home. Taste has so many intricate affects and meets various needs from celebration, to nutrition, and to prayer. All should be included thoughtfully through the patterns of home-making.

On a daily basis, I serve the best food I can afford that will enrich the bodies of my family. Wholesome food helps us think clearly and have energy to serve others. I find if I am not eating balanced meals and snacks, my mental clarity and physical stamina plummet. I go into more depth about how my faith affects impacts healthy eating habits in the post:  Pursuing Health for God’s Glory. Someone once told me that it is those who are sick who eat the healthiest diets. It is because the sick are the ones who are who realize the value nutrients bring their bodies because the sick hunger for healing so their souls can engage in life without the restrictions their body presents. One should not wait until our bodies malfunction before beginning healthy eating practices. Each day is the time to nourish our body, so we can be as physically fit as possible for us. Yes, that level of health will vary from person to person depending on the body God has given us and its age. Regardless, it is our responsibility to maintain properly, just like our car, our house, and our children. We must care for our bodies the best we know how to do. Food should be eaten with others in mind, not for our temporary selfish comfort.

I make it a priority in our home to share the tastes of our home with others. When I share the tastes of our home, I am essentially sharing the goodness God has poured upon us, with others. I LOVE doing that! I like to keep casseroles, bread, and soups in my freezer at all times. It is so easy to grab a few items and deliver them to whomever the Lord lays on my heart at any given moment. If I have nothing adequate prepared, I have a small list of “go to” comfort dishes to take to folks. We once had a sweet neighbor, and I enjoyed setting aside a portion of the food I made to tun over to her. I also love having others in our home to share food around our table and fellowship! My point is that we must find ways we can share the tastes of our home with others. So often we wait too long for opportunistic to pop up instead of making our own opportunities. Sharing food with others can be done on a weekly basis without too much effort. We can run some cookies to our neighbors, take a jar of home-made soup to a sick family we know, invite folks over for a meal, run a surprise dinner over to the single working mom across the street…with food in our hands, we can intrude into others lives with ease. For those who want to learn more about how to minister with food, I do include more practical tips about sharing food in the post: Sharing Meals With Others.

I like to use food as a tool of showing God’s goodness to hurting hearts. Food can provide a level of comfort. Eating food for the comfort it brings is not entirely evil. There are seasons in our lives where we draw comfort from silence, music, a walk in nature, or a cuddle with a furry creature by the fire. God has made an incredible world full of little things that bring us joy. Now, God is certainly the source of eternal, lasting comfort. Truths from Scripture will provide our souls with the kind of comfort that heals our wounds. “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God” II Corinthians 1:3-4. Food can be an incredible tool that can help us reflect on God, His goodness, and blessing. Sometimes a meal from the past brings comfort as we are reminded of sweet memories and blessings the Lord has given us in the years before. Sometimes a meal taken to a hurting soul provides comfort as that meal is eaten with thoughts of not facing trials alone and God’s sustaining grace through each moment. Food shared with hurting souls can be such a beautiful picture of the table prepared for us by our Loving Shepherd. If I know my husband has had a rough day at work, I will often choose to cook something comforting, a favorite casserole or meat and potatoes dish, I can ease the stress of his day by preparing a meal that will bring rest to his soul. Food, like no other sense, can aid in helping souls see the many blessings in their lives and praise God for His goodness. 

Food can serve as a means of celebration. A dear friend of mine once pulled me aside as I struggled over the enormous amounts of sugar being fed to my children during Christmas. She kindly reminded me that throughout the history of Israel, various feasts were encouraged to help the people remember the faithfulness of God. The Passover is one such feast and every item in the Passover meal is symbolic for s And as Christians, we should embrace seasons of feasting with grace, not guilt. Certain foods are customary in our home for specific holidays. As a home-maker, I can use those foods in ways that will help my children remember the holiday and remember the goodness of God as we make and enjoy Christmas cookies, pumpkin pie, and cinnamon rolls. Those are not every-day foods, but ones reserved for a day of worship and joy in our God. It is not enjoyed in vain. Now, there are traditions others in our family hold to certain feasting days, we are not all the same, and we can change some of our traditions into healthier versions if we so desire. Now, feasting does not mean gluttony. I will note here that gluttony and feasting are different. Feasting is a heart enjoying in gratitude for God’s blessing. Gluttony is over-indulging in food with a thankless, mindless greed. Gluttony is always a sin, and has nothing to do with how much a person weighs, but about the greedy heart of the thankless eater.

The absence of food is also important when we homemakers set aside time to fast. I am a firm believer in the art of fasting and prayer. I have seen the Lord work amazing things when I have set aside my physical hungers in my desperation to see the Lord work. My heart in prayer with even more fervency than on a full stomach. As my body feels the pangs of hunger the hunger fills my prayers. For those who have not taken a time to fast, it is well worth the effort. Yes, it takes discipline, but it is amazing to me how the physical cravings can be flipped into spiritual cries from my soul. I have a friend who would set aside Sunday’s to fast and pray. Another who fasts every Wednesday for his children. One day doesn’t make me hungry enough to bring my soul into fervent prayer. I often prefer to do a week to three week increment. It isn’t always going completely without food either, sometimes limiting myself to bone broth or a simple vegetable soup once a day keeps me hungry, but also gives me enough energy to keep up with my children for that time. Recently, Esther has come to mind and her request to Mordecai that he and all Israel fast and pray with her before she went to see the king. “Go, gather all the Jews to be found in Susa, and hold a fast on my behalf, and do not eat or drink for three days, night or day. I and my young women will also fast as you do. Then I will go to the king, though it is against the law, and if I perish, I perish” Esther 4:16. The people of Nineveh also fasted and prayed fervently as described in Jonah 3:5-8. Desperate people will fast and pray. Are we not desperate? Fasting is not practiced by many Christians. It is almost as though we are awkward even talking about it. Many people don’t even know what it means to fast. Most of us simply don’t make time for it in our lives. We fear the discomfort we will have from fasting more than the spiritual discomfort we experience. Fasting should not be something we are self-conscious about as Christians. It should be a way of life. But as Jesus reminds us, we are not to tote it about pridefully either. It is not a badge of honor, it is a humbling, serious, prayerful experience we should make plans to embrace in our lives.

Regular meal times are invaluable. In our own home, I guard mealtimes. We have a dining room, which I love. That is where we sit down every evening together to eat dinner. I try to keep meals “on the go” to a bare minimum and plan our schedules around dinner-time. It is a time our family can re-group, fellowship with each others, and well…learn how to love others by practicing good manners. Our sit down dinners vary in formality depending upon the meal and time I have in the day to prepare dinner. But we always sit together. My husband’s evening work hours are always different depending upon meetings and sometimes traffic. So, we do have a later dinner hour than most. On rare occasions I will feed the children early, but in general we wait until he is home so we can enjoy dinner together. The family dinner table is not something required in Scripture. It is very much a personal endeavor as a home-maker to connect the lives of everyone inside the home for one short period in the day. It also enables me to make sure balanced eating habits are maintained. I believe it is an important time for my children to share their day with their busy Daddy too. Maintaining dinnertime is a way I have found that, whether they know it or not, ministers to the souls of my husband and children.

I love being able to use tastes to minister to not only my own soul, but everyone I can! Food is truly a versatile toll of ministry like no other. I do believe how I use taste in the home is an evolving process, and will continue to grow and change through the years as  I continue to taste the goodness from the table of my heavenly Father!

“Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!” Ps. 34:8

The Ministry of Sound in the Home

Sound is probably the most important human sense.

I took a special needs psychology course in college and was challenged to go out in public for several hours without the use of one of my senses. I choose to go without sight. I believed sight would be the most difficult sense to go without and wanted to experience what it would be like not to see.

So, I put band-aids and sunglasses over my eyes and had a friend drive me to the grocery store and then a restaurant for dinner. I thought not having sight would be far more challenging than it was. I was surprised that I could navigate my way through the store using my senses of sound and touch. I was able to pick out items I needed. I even dropped coins and pick them up. I managed to find my credit card in my purse to pay. I also enjoyed a splendid lunch with my friend.

After experiencing a sightless adventures, I became extra grateful for my other senses, especially my hearing.  I could engage in conversation with my friend, hear cars, conversation, enjoy music, and even sense the closeness of objects because of my reliance hearing. Had it not have been for my ears, I would have been at a terrible loss. I also would have felt completely alone and isolated. I learned that day that not being able to hear would be far more depressing than not being able to see.

Have you ever noticed while watching a movie how the music is truly what engages your emotions during the plot? Watching a movie in silence would not have near the affect as even listening to the soundtrack with closed eyes! The music gives away more of the plot in a movie than the visual affects. We can tell a scary event is occurring simply by the change in music. Romantic portions of a movie have certain notes, as well as the heart pounding rush of a man on the run. The music sets the tone for what we see and feel throughout a plot. Movies that are extremely successful are also known for their amazing soundtracks.

Stores also know the power of sound. The music played in Fresh Market sets a tone of elegance and leisure while a store like Best Buy monopolizes on the latest hits to emphasize the modern tone of their store. Restaurants often play music that will either speed people up on their eating experience, or cause them to relax and slow down a bit. What sounds we hear in various places are not put there haphazardly, but with careful thought to the impact those sound will have on our psychology. 

In the home, sound is also a crucial player in ministering to our souls. Just like the sights of our home must be thought out as discussed in The Ministry of Sight in the Home, so it is important for us homemakers to set the auditory atmosphere in our home. As a Christian, I strive to have sound in my home that allow the soul to be free and at ease to seek God, I also try to eliminate sounds that are disturbing. I find there is more chaos in obnoxious, incoherent, mixtures of sounds than in the chaos of what I see visually. Although sounds in the home, especially with lots of children, can be sometimes difficult to manage, my husband and I work on keeping excessive loudness down inside the home and maintaining peaceful and nurturing audio in conversation and entertainment.

There are a few basic steps I have taken to ensure control what is heard in our home. 

Maintain volume guidelines. This is crucial for every home, but extra difficult the more little people that live in a home. I do believe the volume does have to flex a bit according to the size of the home and the size of the family. We instruct our children to use quieter and keep their volume down while inside the house, but do allow a lot more vocal exuberance when they are outdoors. I have little tolerance for squabbling and whining and fits are simply not tolerated. I have often sent an incessantly fussy child to his or her room with instructions not to return until he or she is done fussing and pleasant to be around again. If that fails, the child in question has signed himself or herself up for an afternoon nap. Sometimes, extreme grumpiness is a result of a poor night sleep or overstimulates the day before, or even the first clue a child isn’t feeling well. A nap has altered many a bad emotional course in our home. Hey…it even works for me!

Build a quiet time into each day. I have built in an hour-two hour quiet time in every day. It is a moment of quiet for myself as well as for each of my children. Even little ones need a social break. Children under five spend the quiet time in their rooms, usually napping. If napping days are past, quiet play is permitted. Each child older than five plays alone and quietly for the one to two hours, usually after lunch I ask each child to pick a spot where he or she is going to be for quiet time. And they gather coloring, toys, or books, art supplies, and nestle in that spot for an hour or so, no TV or electronic devices are permitted. On occasion I will allow quiet group play, like play-doh at the kitchen table or even outdoor play, but the children are not allowed to bother me except for emergencies. They know this quiet time is important for them and to me as well. I can study Scripture, pray, write, take a nap if needed, make phone calls, or catch up on housework. This quiet moment in the day is gold to me. 

Don’t mix too many various sounds. I have a one thing at a time policy for many things in our home. The children play with one toy at a time and pick it up before moving on to another. If I allow nature to take its course, toy after toy would be pulled out, every room would be a disaster by the end of the day. By keeping a “one-toy-out-at-a-time” policy, this does not happen. Sounds are the same way. We do not practice piano while the stereo is on, one will be turned off before engaging in the next sound. 

Allow noise in designated times and places. Yelling and shouting is for outdoors in our home. I do not give the children volume regulations when they play outside, unless they are going out before 9 a.m. of course. There are also certain toys that are specifically outdoor toys…horns and whistles to name two. If those toys are played in the house, I take them away for a while. I am strict about this rule because the volume of noise from a whistle or horn would overwhelm our home. Most battery powered toys today are not as obnoxious as I remember as a child, however musical instruments can border on obnoxious if played with inexperienced hands. I feel it is important for children to explore musical instruments, so do not disband them in the house. We have bells, a recorder and a piano, but all three are not engaged simultaneously. And very often a time limit is imposed for the exceptionally loud “concerts.”

Listen to music and podcasts that draw our hearts into worship and growth in our walk with God, not pull us away from Him or distract us from finding our complete satisfaction and joy in God. I have my favorite podcasting friends I love to listen to on a regular basis. But, I also find worship music and classical music to be my “go-to’s” for daily listening. Those genres minister to my soul more than any other type of music. I admit that Mozart plays in our home the most. I love the intelligent calm my soul receives from listening to Mozart. I find myself able to think better than any other genre. Not everyone is wired the same, so certainly there is plenty of room  for various tastes and needs. My husband can stomach news and weather broadcasts and keeps up on them without too much aggravation. I find the bias and irrelevance too frustrating for my heart and do not keep up with listening to news or political events. This does not mean I am apathetic, but that I simply am very choosy about what I put in my brain. I prefer to read news from selected sources rather than listen to it. I also do not want my children to listen to the news until they are old enough to discern truth from fiction and recognize methods of propaganda. So, we don’t watch or listen to news in our home. Regardless of what we choose to listen to in our home, it should be something we spend time considering and don’t thoughtlessly let our ears hear voices that could impact our souls.

Don’t underestimate the power of silence. Silence is a very wonderful indulgence for our ears. How easy it is to have noise constantly pouring into our souls from our ears, it can be very difficult to “be still and know that I am God” Psalm 46:10 if we don’t embrace quiet in our lives. As a camp counselor one summer, part of my training was to go out into the woods at night. Woods in the middle of nowhere in the dark of night truly limits ones sense of sight, and I was taught to embrace the sounds of the night. How rarely we actually listen to the world around us! Crickets, bugs crawling on dry leaves, sticks falling from a tree, and the slight rustle of leaves in the breeze… all of what our ears hear points to our amazing Creator and can draw our hearts to worship. Sometimes, only in silence can a soul actually hear what it was made to hear.

Fighting and arguing should be moved from quickly. Scripture commands us in Romans 12:8 “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” We are a family of sinners, living in a sinful fallen world, so yes, there are times when the sounds in our home are not beautiful. My children do squabble. They do say hurtful things to each other. They can be very cranky and argumentative. My goal is to nip it quickly. It takes two to disagree, so I usually find the perpetrators and try to discern the reason for the quarrel. Very often, pointing them to Christ is all it takes to re-align their thoughts. “Does what you are doing and saying bring God glory?” Then a hug between the two offenders accompanied with an apology ensues. Giggles often follow as the two try to over-hug. But I do believe humor is a great mood adjuster…making my children partake in a tickle fight or game of making funny faces is very helpful in getting them to change mental directions. I do not want to ignore their squabbles no mater how trifle they seem to me. Disagreements are normal, but it is important to teach children how to handle those situations and how to move past that moment of pain and back into friendship. I do realize not every child is wired to adjust his or her attitude on a dime, but as parents who know our children, we can certainly find ways that work for each of our children, to help them respond in biblical ways to squabbles and hurts. This takes time…years in fact, but it is essential to cultivate in little hearts. Way too many adults have no idea how to handle conflict correctly, leading to broken relationships, divorce, and un-Christlike Christian testimonies. As the post His Grandma Shocked Me describes, it is essential for our grown-up hearts to learn and practice quick make-ups that finish with a dash of warmth. Bitterness, grudges, the silent treatment are immature and godless responses to disagreements and hurts in children just as much as in adults.

Yelling and shouting is for outdoor play and emergencies…that includes Mommy and Daddy. There are occasions for shouting and yelling like: “Stop running into the road!” But very often, I try to keep that sort of volume for emergencies. In our home, we have utilized technology to help keep yelling and shouting to a minimum. We have Amazon Echo in almost every room of our home and find that to be an excellent venue for announcements and intercom chats. I can call children to dinner from my kitchen, without raising my voice. My husband can drop in the children’s rooms and tell them to be quiet at bedtime. It has worked out quite well for us. If I must address a child, firmness is my mode of conversation over volume. I know there can be some very long frustrating days for parents, but to keep an atmosphere of peace and godliness, both my husband and I do our best use firm, serious voices instead of loud, angry voices in addressing those situations that must be dealt with sternly. I want my children to pay attention when I yell, and if I am always yelling, they will quickly learn that it doesn’t matter. so, if I do raise my voice, it is for a matter of upmost urgency and they all look right at me with wide eyes. 

Oh how crucial it is for a home-maker to have mastery over the sounds in her home! Chaos in the ears goes straight to the soul. We can cultivate such beautiful environments for spiritual growth, godly focus, and worship if we purpose what sounds echo throughout the walls of our home.